Thank you. I was expecting worse from you. You are right. I do need to stop bringing up the subject and I've tried but when D starts mentioning the name, it bothers me. D even said "ricky is handsome" this morning. Ugghhh!
Abby is my focus though and I've realized how good of a job I'm doing. My brother commented how attached this girl is to me and how its probably cause W fled. In fact as I'm typing Abby comes a running to see where I am.
The other stuff I need to focus on more. My post is valid and I know I reached a low point and deep down I know I still want this otherwise why would I have felt like crap so quickly after. I need to detach more and more, I need to stop mentioning his name and I need to finish DR again....i reread the first 3rd of the book already.
M 35 W 28 D 4
Bomb 4/28/08 Found out about PA 05/14/08 Separated 5/25/08 (not legally)
You're alright. In the midst of our anxiety and nervousness we are all inclined to do some stupid things. I did my share. Hopefully you recognize that this was not a good direction and you can chalk it up as a lesson learned.
This is hard. Anyone here will tell you that. Keep your focus on the basics right now. When you're stronger and have your feet under you better you can worry about other things.
Bill
"Don't tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon."
Well I passed a small test. I'm always "Mr. Fixit" and w dropped by to see Abby and give me a card for father's day. She briefly talked about how she still has no fire alarm or cold water. I suggested going online and getting the number of the management company. I started to suggest I would do while she was getting ready to leave. Then I stopped. Why should I? Its her problem not mine.
So I said good bye and walked upstairs. It felt much better not to help her.
M 35 W 28 D 4
Bomb 4/28/08 Found out about PA 05/14/08 Separated 5/25/08 (not legally)
I can't understand why I'm so down today. Parents coming over, incredibly cute D, oldest brother hung out for a couple days....I should be feeling better. I don't get this. Oh well, like I said on another thread.....up and down, up and down.
M 35 W 28 D 4
Bomb 4/28/08 Found out about PA 05/14/08 Separated 5/25/08 (not legally)
Wow! My W is so out of it.....so absorbed in her life now.
After she stopped by yesterday she asked what Abby and I would do today, since Abby's school is closed for the day. Obviously W remembered that Abby was home for the day.
I woke up this morning at about 8:30 (I let Abby sleep in my bed again). I went downstairs and saw that I had three missed calls from W at 7:30. So I called her back. Supposedly she was calling and knocking on the door because she thought she had to pick up Abby. Hilarious! I wish I could have seen her out there. She obviously realized or remember that Abby had no school.
W is so self absorbed she can't even remember things about her D. Like I told my parents yesterday....that person is not my W, but someone else.
Ironically, my mother thinks W will snap out of it soon. Weird because my mother and W never got along.
M 35 W 28 D 4
Bomb 4/28/08 Found out about PA 05/14/08 Separated 5/25/08 (not legally)
Having updated in a while but I figure this last episode was priceless.
I get a text from W. "Who are you sleeping with?" I reply huh. She's answered. "I know you are." I said "what?" She's replies. "I know you are sleeping with someone." I just said. "If you say so." Nothing follows.
Well, I don't know how, but she must've found out. But I don't care. And when she drops Abby off I hope she opens her mouth because I'm ready to tell her how I really feel.
She's been lying for 18 months, sleeping with god knows who. During that time I wasted a ton of money trying to fix things, took her on two major trips with her cheating on me two weeks after the Hawaii trip. Then when she moves out, she's says lets do MC and two days later I find her in her new place with OM. At this point, I basically slowly detach and do a good job (in fact two nights ago she invited me over to her apt but I declined). I know she's seeing him and doing him and whoever else and then she's got the nerve to spy on me and accuse me of something sh'es been doing for months or years. What a beeeottch!
I so hope to confronts me!!!!
M 35 W 28 D 4
Bomb 4/28/08 Found out about PA 05/14/08 Separated 5/25/08 (not legally)
You tell her that it's none of her business and end the conversation.
You venting to her does NOTHING.
Even if this ends at some point, you will have to coparent together and trust me, peace is better than war in that scenario.
You don't have to like what she did. She doesn't have to like what you did. Right now the other partners activities are the not the concern of the other.
Take the high road. The other road is full of regrets.
Bill
"Don't tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon."
I wasn't going to really vent....i was going to calmly tell her its not her concern and then point out all that's she's done to back up my point. Might not be a good idea but she deserves it. I don't know....we'll see.
Funny that she's suddenly spying. Hmmm!
M 35 W 28 D 4
Bomb 4/28/08 Found out about PA 05/14/08 Separated 5/25/08 (not legally)
Here it is, Sunday night. W came over for dinner (MIL invited her) but I didn't mind. Right now W is trying to leave but D is saying "don't leave....play a little more....I never play with you." Its really tearing my heart....not for the W thing, but D thing. I know she's dying to leave because she was texting him after dinner. I said "tell him another hour" and she got that embarassed look and said why should I come here if you're going to say that.
Can't believer this is the person I loved for 10 years.
M 35 W 28 D 4
Bomb 4/28/08 Found out about PA 05/14/08 Separated 5/25/08 (not legally)
