Don't you HATE losing posts? It never comes out as good the next time around.

Still I know what you meant. Indeed today I got an e-card from CJ, very nice, loving, sweet, and a personal message saying he hoped the "anniversary" of this weekend didn't spoil our time at the festival, and that we should look forward, not past. I wonder if he had a little peak at the BB this morning?

Regardless, it was very nice to have an acknowledgement of the issue.

Yesterday I woke up kind of crabby. Fussed about there being "nothing" in the house for lunch. CJ ran to the grocery store.

Then outside doing yardwork we had another "moment". I'd done a bunch of weeding, then decided to start tidying up this section beside our car port which is a total disgrace.

I'm talking the box from our dishwasher (3 years old) full of soggy leaves and debris, two orange garbage bags full of weeds from 4? years ago, split open, new weeds growing from them. Weeds, leaves etc.

Well I've mentioned this eye sore a few times over the years. This year CJ said he'd hire someone to take all of that crap away along with the huge pile of twigs, weeds, etc that is under our maple tree. Good!

But it's all still there. So last week while CJ was inside on the computer, I started on one section, moving the ladder away from our house so I could snip off the branches of the little trees growing out of our foundation.

I no sooner got started when CJ came out asking what I was doing. I told him, and he seemed emphatic that I NOT continue beyond that section, that he'd get to the rest, so I finished what I'd started and moved on.

Yesterday I decided to throw out some of the other clutter (plant containers with skeletal remains etc) and work on it again. Again CJ basically pre-empted my work.

I must admit I got testy and started in with this kind of talk: "So, you're going to get it done this week?, You're going to hire someone to come and take it all away?"

When he hesitated and said he might not be able to do all the trimming he wanted to before they come, I had to say "What's preventing you from getting that all done this week?"

Can you say "Controlling?"

What I REALLY wanted to convey was that the procrastination on these things drives me CRAZY!!!

Seriously, I was READY to give cleaning the whole mess up myself a shot. I wasn't doing it to make CJ feel guilty or make him help me (I kind of think he felt that way).

So anyway, I moved on to using the new hand-grip trimmer and had great fun with that for the next hour or so.

We didn't have dinner plans, but I came in and proposed a nice pasta dinner with roasted red peppers. CJ came into the kitchen to ask if he could help, but I told him I had it all under control.

During dinner I apologized for earlier, and said that since I started the day crabby, I thought I'd end it on a better note. So the evening was good.

However, I never really told CJ how I felt during our episode, and how much it would mean to me if we set some kind of goals for getting certain things done around here.

That's next, I suppose.

Three positive:

1) it's sunny and warm!
2) my class went well today, even though I'm teaching neural function and brain structure
3) Had left over meatballs for lunch!
4) CJ's out pricing computers!

Shiny