I was posting to Sage when I remembered something pretty significant from last evening.
We were finishing dinner when CJ asked me about the dream I had this morning that I had to get on the computer to record.
Alas it was another in a LOOOONG series of "Shabby Apartment" dreams that I've been having since probably 94 or 95. In all of them up to now, I'm living in a shabby apartment, dangerous part of town, poor. At first I'm rather okay with the place, then notice scary things like the door is hanging off the hinges, the lock is just a chain and hook, the place is depressing. Then I become "aware" of my "real home" (our house) and I feel an intense longing for it, worry about the cats and plants, and feelings of loss, concern about paying for "both places".
These dreams were a MAJOR conundrum for me until after the final bomb last Feb. Then I realized that the "shabby apartment" symbolized the "shabby state" of my M, or my part in it. "our house" symbolized what could be, the golden dream.
At any rate the dream I had yesterday morning involved some interesting twists on the usual format. In this one I had a bunch of cute 20-something roommates, all male. I'm actually sitting on the couch kind of flirting with one of them when I "realize" that CJ exists and I'm married to him, although we are separated! I stop the flirting immediately (this always happens, even in my dreams! )
Then, "poof" CJ is there, wanting me to "come home" with him. Here's the oddest part: I agree to leave the shabby apartment, but I insist he take me to my mother's as I'm not ready to "go home" with him!!!
This is the first time CJ has ever showed up to "save me" from my shabby apartment. This is the first dream in which I actuall leave the premises! But what about wanting to go to my mom's? A message from my unconscious that although things are going very well right now, I'm still a bit "gunshy"???
So that was my dream. CJ's involved all KINDS of references to his old job, to the things he is working on now (upcoming conference, setting up his own consulting business etc.).
The GREAT thing here is that he shared the dream with me, and his interpretation of it (I added a few things, but dream interpretation is HIS forte as well ).
So I NOW have a much better understanding of what kinds of pressure he is under right now. The last scene of his dream has the word "RUSH" projected on a screen. He's been working on the best way to put all of his plans into place in the right sequence etc.
So this gave us an opportunity to TALK about it all . I was very supportive, asked if there was anything I could do to help. And then THANKED him for sharing that with me.
If he HADN'T, I wouldn't know why he needed the computer so much. I might have been more miffed if things weren't done around the house. Now I know to give him support over the next few weeks and encourage him to talk to me about how things are going.
)
).
