Ok. It's been a weird week. More $$ challenges putting a damper on plans. Frustrating to be sure, but not one bad interaction with each other about it. I've learned how to listen. I've learned how to give him space instead of insisting he tell me what he's thinking and trying to problem-solve/ meaning FIX everything that is affecting his every precious mood. The guy must have felt like he was under a microscope at times. Duh, just because he's quiet and upset about ruined plans or money problems doesn't mean he's sorry he's with me.
Oh, and something else bothered me about my post back there. When I mentioned (haha reeeal funny) that I need to learn how to handle the money talks because it "just MIGHT happen again."
Well, that is a chicken $%^& way to think. If I can just work a little harder, this just might NOT happen again. AHA. That was bothering me so I had to get it out. I don't have to be perfect (I was struggling this week with that also), but if I'm not giving my best then I'm fooling myself more than him.
Anyway, that afternoon, about half an hour after I posted, he surprised me by stopping by the house with a chicken sandwich for me (yeah, I know, real romantic, lol) and asked me for a hug. I got a touch teary and tried to apologize again and just melted over the sandwich (which was actually greasy and yuk, but it was truly the thought that melted me). He quieted me and told me it wasn't my fault, he'd already worked out the stages of anger, sadness, etc., and everything would be fine.
The purchase was necessary, but I could've settled for less costly option. I actually don't regret my choice at all. I regret not telling him how much I spent even though he never asked. I regret not keeping better track of records and my timing. But heck, I was never mad that he bought that tv either. I just don't get that upset about temporary setbacks. We aren't in danger of losing anything or starving so I just shrug and figure it's a challenge to get creative for a while to get through it.
I wonder if he took me seriously that day I told him to skip all the stages and get to the part where he's sorry, I'm wonderful, time to make up? LOL. All I know is he was EXTRA sweet. Called me later in the day and said he missed me. Brought home treats after work (I have this thing for boiled crawfish and beer lately) and we had a great weekend finding ways to do stuff without spending money. We're kind of making a game out of it lately.
All week, I found a way to substitute all sorts of macguyverish things and ingredients so I wouldn't spend money. It was fun. He noticed without me saying a word and thanked me for the silliest things. Last night when a particular bad $$ blow hit him, he just let out the steam and vented, specifically saying it's not my fault, and I just listened to him. Didn't try to sugarcoat things, be the optimist, just listened.
