NTE - I really think you should start with just the one topic - what sex means to you, the connection, and how you hope to save your marriage before its too late. (YES I do think you should word it like that, not a threat, just reality that the marriage will slip away without "fixing" this thing).
The second part, her requests for more foreplay, is going to be part of a longer "getting to know each other" process. In my opinion, you are going to have to get her on board for recovery first, and then talk about how to get there.
If she can't or won't get on board, realize how important this is, and decide for herself that she wants to save her marriage, then what will be the point of talking about more foreplay?
Just my two cents...
Separetely, in order to maybe give you feedback if I can, can you describe for me what you DO do during foreplay? I want to see if I can help you ferret out what she means by "its all about you". If that's too personal or you dont want to get into it, no problem.
