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hoosiermama #1488224 06/20/08 04:00 AM
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Yeah...I hear you...kind of disappointing. I know you have a great heart though, I'd imagine forgiveness is your hallmark.

Last edited by sgctxok; 06/20/08 04:05 AM.

sg
Love is PATIENT, love is KIND, LOVE never fails / DB since 2001
sgctxok #1488531 06/20/08 02:31 PM
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Actually, I'm not at all good at forgiveness. Family of origin issues and all that--mom was involved with an abusive alcoholic from the time I was 10 until I went to college. Saw the abuse cycle over and over, she forgave him over and over for beating us both up, kept taking him back when all I wanted was to be safe. That's my example of forgiveness--outright codependence. So I don't really know how to "let it go" without feeling like I have no boundaries. I've been working on that one most of my life and I know I've made progress. But I have a long way to go. I'm not sure I was ever truly able to forgive H when he left me (just as our dating relationship began to become serious, and while I was being stalked by a prior xh) to enter a monastery--one last shot at Catholic priesthood. No, I'm not making this up.

Any ideas? Because there will be a lot of forgiving to do as I move through this MLC/A/separation, both with H and with those who cut me off.


M60
H52
D20
M14 yrs
OW-old gf from 1986
bomb-5/18/08
H filed for D-9/10/08
D final 4/24/09
xH remarried (not OW) 2012
hoosiermama #1489254 06/21/08 03:06 AM
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Originally Posted By: hoosiermama
Actually, I'm not at all good at forgiveness. Family of origin issues and all that--mom was involved with an abusive alcoholic from the time I was 10 until I went to college. Saw the abuse cycle over and over, she forgave him over and over for beating us both up, kept taking him back when all I wanted was to be safe. That's my example of forgiveness--outright codependence. So I don't really know how to "let it go" without feeling like I have no boundaries. I've been working on that one most of my life and I know I've made progress. But I have a long way to go. I'm not sure I was ever truly able to forgive H when he left me (just as our dating relationship began to become serious, and while I was being stalked by a prior xh) to enter a monastery--one last shot at Catholic priesthood. No, I'm not making this up.

Any ideas? Because there will be a lot of forgiving to do as I move through this MLC/A/separation, both with H and with those who cut me off.


Well, alrighty then...you've got your work cut out for you, huh?

Let's not worry about that now. All in good time, my pretty, all in good time \:\)

More on treating you WELL.


sg
Love is PATIENT, love is KIND, LOVE never fails / DB since 2001
sgctxok #1489429 06/21/08 09:56 AM
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 2,608
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Thank you. Yes, lotsa work to do. Right now, I have to find a job before this one runs out. And I'm flat broke--I really wish I'd seen this coming, because I would have saved some money up.


M60
H52
D20
M14 yrs
OW-old gf from 1986
bomb-5/18/08
H filed for D-9/10/08
D final 4/24/09
xH remarried (not OW) 2012
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