Lanzo, I think the lack of coordination that occurred yesterday is reflective of the transition that is occurring in our R. One gets used to being single again in a sense, and it's easy to miss the cues when the spouse wants to be in partnership again. I have to learn to think as a partner again, or for the first time with different situations.
My W wants me to assist her in waking-up. I approach it as I'll wake her up, if I'm up, but otherwise she's on her own. I can understand her embarrassment about calling in sick to her job, fifteen minutes late. Instead of viewing this as an annoyance, I can view it as another sign and opportunity as you say for increased partnership.
I am an early riser anyway, so it's not a problem usually to wake her up. She's asking for my help, and is hurt when I fail to assist her.
I did get another scolding later in the day, but I listened and let her say her piece. I could only offer that I too slept in that morning as an excuse.
We got back on-track later that day with the dance lesson, and dancing at a downtown venue that evening. I'm getting more confident on the dance floor.
My dance teacher said that dancing is allowing me to express a part of myself that is within me but needed a way to be expressed. I think she knows the dynamics between my W and I, and the intimacy issues that I have. Dance lessons are also dance therapy.
CL
CL 53 W 54 M 20 yrs. 03'-09' Separation + Old Patterns + GAL 10-14' Piecing
"The Master allows things to happen. She shapes events as they come."
