A few nights ago my son told me(when I dropped him off at XW) hes scared. We talked(mom in bed) and he told me she hasnt been around much so he doeant feel "safe". Said hes afraid she wont wake up if theres a problem, she will leave and not tell him and he feels alone when shes there. We talked...I said she loved him etc. Just tried to reassure him. Later after I left I texted and told her we needed to talk about our son. She replied he was sleeping with her....no big deal. Next day I asked why and he said he heard some noises and was scared. Told me he wanted me there. I know....insecurity caused by the disruption. He then told me at 3 am her bf knocked on the window and wanted in so she made my son go upstairs and the bf slept there. In the morning she left and he stayed (sleeping) and then left.
I feel its very inappropriate and possibly unsafe and it made me angry. She said hes fine (sexually abused as a kid, ex alcoholic, has cheated on her, lied, told everyone where she works about what they do, and more). Doesnt sound so good to me. On top of that shes now allowing her 17 year old d to have her bf spend the night. When I asked why she said "I have my reasons". To that I said "Why wont you say anything to her(as in NO)? Afraid you will look like an ass?"
Am I wrong to think this is all wrong and sets a very bad example for my son. Shes sleeping with him an the house and my son has knocked on the bedroom door to see her answer in his shirt while hes in bed.
Or is MY head screwed on wrong????
Bill_S,
You exW has NO clue as to right vs. wrong.......
She leaves your M.......
She has an A........
She allows OM to "stay over" when the kids are there.....
She allows D to have BF "sleep over".....
You need to let her know what you think......
You CANNOT "force" her to do anything....
But, you can let her know how you feel...
I would also strongly suggest e-mailing her so you have documentation for CYA or other use later......
Take Care,
NMD
"Chains do not hold a marriage together. It is threads, hundreds of tiny threads which sew people together through the years. That is what makes a marriage last --more than passion or even sex!" - Simone Signoret
