It is pretty amazing how the whole mote/beam concept works. I would be hanging on to my beam for dear life if I were making the choices she's making...couldn't live with myself if I didn't. Actually, I take that back. I've always been more of a hunt and eliminate the beam kind of girl. But we all have our path to walk...
You have such a great handle on your stewardship in all this. And it sounds as if you have raised/are raising some truly incredible kids.
You're in my prayers every day. (You too BeingMe.)