I said those things to her so she could work on herself. Many times people don't know a good thing until its gone. I'm not saying I'm a good thing or that I'm leaving, but I've seen worse H's than myself out there.
My W and I talk, but she doesn't have any interest beyond that. Lately, I've been doing alot of praying and trying to change the way I'm thinking about my stich.
I'm a lucky guy other than having a indifferent W. I have my health, a beautiful and caring D10 and my W doesn't want a divorce. She isn't trying to take advantage of me, but b/c I feel sorry for her I help out. We talk and do some laughing.
I thank God everyday for what I have. I've stopped asking him to intervene and change my W's mind. I know everyone has freewill and God doesn't change peoples minds. It just shows you how desperate and needy I've become. Instead of looking at a life that didn't turn out the way I wanted, I'm looking at a life that has so much potential.
I haven't made plans this summer. I keep trying to get D10 to go to Disneyland but she too afraid of the characters. I plan a few day trips here and there. I don't live far from a beach in the New England area so I'm go there a few times.
Thanks for checking in on me. I hope all is well with you.
