From my point of view. If he is really stressed, and you should know for sure as you have been married long enough, then this can have a really huge effect on him. I know when I get stressed I want to pull into my shell and I would probably not initiate sex as often as normal. HOWEVER, this would not be reflective of my actual NEED. I would NEED to have sex more often to feel connected and comforted in my relationship with my wife.
It sounds to me like this is where your husband is. So, stay encouraged and keep doing what you are doing. Dismissive sex with a man is usually pretty obvious, cold during the act, inconsiderate before during and after. This ususally translates to something degrading. If he was mad, that is what you would be getting. Remember, he is calling from work, great sign.
My opinion on the grabbing and showing thing, good sign. This is him making sure he is attractive to you, not a tease in a negative sense. Think from a man's perspective. If you showed up in a miniskirt with nothing underneath or no bra (depends on his individual fetish here) and then flashed him, he would about lose it. Now, women generally do not get turned on by their man wagging his parts, but from a man's point of view they should, he would if he were a woman. To him that is the ultimate expression of his sex and what should be the sexiest part of his body to you (tell me again how big I am..) If you react well to it, like you did, HUGE ego and morale booster.
Look, I sleep naked and it bothers me that my wife never bothers to look to see me when I come to bed. I would love to have her check it out. Doesn't mean we have to go the distance at that point, but it would make me feel desired.
By the way, every day and oral too! Shoot, think I'll go shower...
