in limbo and an emotional mess...

[MAZ]

I hear you LWB, lol. thank you everyone for your congratulations, don't get me wrong, I am happy, but with the situation the way it is right now I can't help but not be as excited as I would be under different circumstances. Sugar, i'm probably around 6 weeks, at least when I talked to the dr. yesterday on the phone they figure i'll be about 8 wks when i go there on the 1st. so that is why i worry about my bad habits over the last few weeks as far as not eating, etc. I also smoke but I stopped that last nite, thats going to be a tough one with all the stress going on. I did start taking pre-natal vitamins this morning and at least having some orange juice or something in the morning, so baby steps. I did talk to H at about 1:00 a.m. this morning when he called from work,, and we talked a bit,, but we are supposed to meet after my sons baseball game tonite to talk some more. He asked what I wanted to do... and I told him I know what I don't want to do but that we just needed to talk. I told him that i assumed he doesn't want me to have a baby right now and he said that is not the case at all, that he is concerned because we are older now, the whole starting over with diapers, daycare, etc again and the 12 year difference in our youngest now and having another child now....he did say it was a pleasant surprise, but not good timing, so who knows, at least he isn't running the other way, not yet anyway,, we'll see what happens when we talk tonite. He left me a message on my cell this morning saying it was nice talking to me last nite even though it was just for a little while. i'll keep you posted
on how it goes tonite. H hasn't mentioned any of this to OW yet so i can only imagine how that will go over, just nervous about how this will go tonite,,,