I have mentioned to you that my co-worker is in your same situation. They suffered from a long term SSM, then she cheated with someone she met online. He is the one that is great at truth darts, helps me with them all the time (his most recent is helping my H face the reality that someone else eventually will be deeply involved in his children's lives). Anywhoooo...she ended her A, they went to Retro, and she is faithful again (did the NC letter with him there, sold all the gifts on Ebay (lol), he gets her cell bill, etc), but they are back to being great friends in a SSM. He is stuck, like you. She is also vain but like your W, it has good effects on the kid (with respect to healthy living).
