So after my stint on the Pity Potty yesterday and with some love & support from my support group here, I managed to listen & take the advice given to me and called W late afternoon under the premise of 'just checking in on you'. I simply said, "D11 & I are going out for my b-day dinner & I would like to offer an invite to you to join us?" It got very quiet on the other end of the phone...I said, "we are going to 'xxxxx' Restaurant, we will be there about 6:30, I said think about it and text me yes or no it would be great if you did. About 45 minutes later I get a text; 'will meet you there at 6:30' SCORE!!!
We both pull in at darn near the same time and park. I can feel she is nervous, so I make a joke about her being all that cause she got a front row parking stall and D11 & I had to park half out in the back 40.(that's farm talk for a field)lol lol! She smiled & chuckled & told me they had just pulled out, I said yeah okay.
She hands me a sack I say what's this she says they are for you I said you really didn't have to but thanks. We go in get a booth sit down and I start up a convo to kinda keep things light and flowing, but it wasn't all that hard to do. D11 is happy smiling laughin, I am listening and lookin W right in the eyes when she is talking, validating like a 'good boy' & I am feeling pretty happy about now. We order W is happy Margs' are 1/2 price I get a beer and the convo just keeps going at a good pace.
We get done eating W says open presents now, she had bought me 2 Ralph Loren Polo shirts I thank her & say I love them you really didn't have to she says its okay I wanted to. (thought here, she would have had to have had them bought already cause they was no way she had time to do it before hand UHM?) so she grabs the check & was going to pay also. WTF! I said that is nice of you, but I asked you to dinner and I will pay for it.
So W says the plates are do on the car, do I have an updated Insurance card, I say you should but I will look in the car yes its in here she says okay. D11 hugs W & heads to the truck so I shut the car door turn around W is right there and gives me a hug not just a hug but a honestly where have you been all my life I miss you hug (if you get what I'm saying). Okay I'm thinking so much for being pissed off this morning dumb ARS! She finally loosens and says thanks I say thanks and begin to walk to the truck, then I remember I wanted to say something earlier to her so I head back to the car. It was something I over heard D11 saying about alittle boyfriend she has & wanted W to know about it.
Get done telling W about it and she asks for another hug so (gee twist my arm) I willing accept. I tell her thanks for making it a special b-day, she says you are going to make me cry you're welcome. Then I go to pull away and she won't let go but instead kisses me (happy birthday TO ME!) she was soft I am in heaven. I go to leave again & she pulls me back and gives the Granddaddy of all kisses my tonsils are laughing. She says peoeple are watching, I said let them she says I am getting light headed (SC is this the way to start 'bending')I thank her again for the shirts and we leave.
I text her about 10:30 and thank her for making it a wonderful day and she says she had a nice time also. Told her to sleep well and goodnight. She says night to me.
So D17 calls and wishes me a happy b-day and apologizes for having to work & miss dinner, I say not your fault and we missed you at dinner. D17 proceeds to tell me that W had talked to her about it already & that W told her it was a very nice time and it just felt right & good/normal....Needless to say that was something to ponder as I went to bed....
I know not to read into any of this, will stand back abit & observe I expect her to pull back some that was ALOT in 1 evening for a WAS; but at least for 1 1/2 hrs I had my true W back
Thank you all for making me go to the next level to try something different in asking her to go. If I never get her back totally I will always have my 45th b-day to remember.
I have no idea what direction this is going, but for once the rollercoaster ride was worth the price of admission.
