Wait why would I initiate the talk? How do I know when I'm ready? This seems like a control tactic that she's going to see through since it's one of her (and her C) big issues with me. It breaks her independance thing. I'm worried it will be counterproductive.
Lynn
Has she complained about you being controlling before? I just ask because playing the "control" card is a great gaslighting technique by a wayward spouse. What a better way to get you to let them continue their affair than by claiming you're "controlling"?
If you recognize it as an issue, work on it. I do in my sitch and am working on it. Do I think I'm the controlling cuss my WW makes me out to be? No, but I can see some things I need to work on and my WW is just used that control card to continue F'ing OM. I think it might have finally sunk in when I told my WW "If you want to accuse me of being controlling because I have a problem with you sleeping with a married man, I can live with that". That's the last time I heard the controlling comment from her.
Hope4us
Me - 49, W 49 S22 & S18 Dday 9/4/07 W claims NC 4/7/08 8/29/09 - Divorce Busted. Lots to work through, but we're going to make it.
