Not sure how I feel about that advice, Puppy. Can you give examples of how it restored your marriage?
Sure. I exposed my wife's affair to our adult daughters (then 18 and 20), my wife's parents and siblings, MY parents and siblings, OM's parents, and my wife's/OM's employer. More than anything I did, I think it was the pressure brought to bear by two people that got thru my wife's stubborn, entitled fog:
My D18 and my mother-in-law. My wife's reaction to their disappointment and disapproval was palpable, and she told me after she came back to me that she respected what I did, and while it made her very, very angry at the time, she knew why I did it -- to try and save our marriage, and to fight for her.
It's not for everyone, but the main idea is that affairs thrive on secrecy and fantasy, and confrontation and exposure removes both -- in a hurry. The lovebirds are then left to deal with the painful reality of the mess they've caused, and suddenly the affair doesn't seem quite so romantic and special.
The other main concept behind it is that others have a right to know, and then to do for themselves what they choose. I would certainly want to know, if the situation were reversed.
