W called me at work again, said she got in trouble at the pool, kids were climbing in the rafters over in the play area and owner yelled at her that she cannot leave the kids climb in the rafters. I'm with my W on this, kids will be kids and you cannot protect them always. We both know that owner was just concerned about liability, but it made my W feel really little, like she wasn't taking care of the kids (crying begins)
She told me how much she does for the kids and her parents never did anything like she does for our kids.(do you see ongoing complaint, how much help others get and she doesn't - how much she does for the kids that her parents didn't do for her). I hear this all the time see prior post by me today second time today. (crying continues)
She talked about how she feels like she isn't doing enough for the children, or she is made to feel that way by watching other parents (crying continues)
She talked about how the kids driver her crazy, she cannot handle all the chaos, and she doesn't want to make the kids crazy. She doesn't like yelling at them. She said she was crazy (crying continues)
I halt conversation to get out of my office and called her back on my cell phone
She talks about her parents and how other people have a relationship with their parents and she doesn't (crying starts again)
She tells me that people think taking care of kids isn't real work, I said that I know taking care of kids was actually very hard work and she was doing the best she could and no one could ask any more of her. (crying continues)
Says she just wants to be happy, and its so hard on her trying to start her life over. Said she just wants to get away from me and the kids so she doesn't screw up our lives. She said she needed a break a vacation day from the kids, so I told her I would take off work next Monday so she could take a break from it all. (crying subsiding)
She said she understands this is hard on me, she feels like such a bad parent, I reassure her that she wasn't, I tell her I'm sorry that she doesn't have a better relationship with her parents like other people do. I tell her I lover her and if she needed me for anything I would be there for her. she said thank you, I didn't expect a I love you back
We all have a long haul ahead of us, good or bad it's the path we choose in life that's important.
M45 W41 M10 3/4 years D9, D6, D6, S5 OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me WAM (Walk Away Mom) 05/31/08 Date I'll forgive W for A = never
