He's "done". Period.

[7 Year Itch]

Trying to hang in. Last night was hard. I think the days will be easier because I'm used to being alone with the girls during the day. Last night it really got to me though. Not that he's been a great companion the last 2 months or anything, but the house was just so dang quiet.

I'm starting to stress more on this separation not being separate enough, and therefor now allowing him to really miss me, the girls, this house, our community etc. I know that sounds strange as I didn't want him to leave, but at least if we are going to go through this hell I'd like it to be productive. But because he is staying with a friend over an hour away, and the logistics of him getting down here to see the girls on work nights etc, much of his visiting will be here at the house.

Like tonight, D6 has a make up T ball game this afternoon at 4:30. He's going to get off work early, come down for that, then take the girls out to dinner, then he told them he'd tuck them in bed. D6 has been staying up until around 9pm since it's summer and schools out. So I decided to go grocery shopping tonight (not often I can do that without kids in tow) but obviously I will need to come home to get the groceries in etc. Then what. Do I take off again, or just go outside and work in my garden and make myself scarce?

He's a great Dad, so plans to see them like every other day. All the weeknight things will probably be here, and we can't afford for him to eat out with them each time he sees them, so how does that work? Do I cook for him with the girls, feed them early, say..... "bring groceries to cook for you and the girls" (not likely since he'd be coming straight from work, and without stopping doesn't get here unil 6:30pm).

I mean, logistically, because he is at a friends and not in his own place where he can take them, and it's so far, I feel like this separation isn't going to be as separate as it should be to maybe affect change.

UGH!

So final question if you got through all that.

He called this morning while I was oustide staining our deck. He left a message saying he just wanted to check on the girls to see how they were doing and to give him a call, or if I didn't want to he'd just see me tonight at the T ball game. I'm planning on NOT calling and just seeing him tonight.

Also, we had some big issues last night with D6 and more destructive behavior in the house (she's been doing this the last couple of months. Ripping wall paper, breaking tile, squirting hand soap on the carpet etc. This is NOT like and and very new)........Anyway, she did the soap carpet thing last night, and I want to tell him about it, but I'm worried that he'll just see it as a "guilt thing" instead of me informing him how they are doing. Thoughts? I think he needs to know it's not all rosy, although he isn't seeing things as they really are right now anyway.

Chris