There is no real transparency plan in place. I've realized that if I want to contact OM, I will contact OM. I can find ways. What I need to do is resolve myself that I will not. If I cannot make that resolution, then I need to leave the marriage.
This is playing with fire. There's nothing wrong with admitting you are powerless over something, and putting an accountability system in place to help you deal with the weakness.
Personally, I just don't think you WANT the accountability system in place. I think you want to be able to contact OM if you choose to do so, without your husband knowing about it. The fact that you are choosing not to tell him about this most recent contact speaks to that as well.
If you are serious about giving your marriage this last, best chance, then I implore you to put a full NO-CONTACT/TRANSPARENCY plan in place, with your husband.
