My h has just texted me saying could we meet up tomorrow to discuss things. He will want to talk about the house I should imagine and I will need to talk about his contribution to the finances.
I really really don't want to meet him. I don't know how I should act or what I should do. This is the first time that I will have seen him since he said everything was over. But I don't have any plans and can't really put him off.
So, my plan is to be calm and kind but not a pushover. To listen and validate when necessary but mainly stay fairly quiet (a complete 180 for me!!). This will be very difficult because he doesn't speak! To listen to his suggestions about the house but not really respond.
I have a clear idea about what I want from the house etc. but I think the best policy would be to say nothing and say I need to go away and think about it. This would encourage another meeting. If we 'sort' everything in this meeting then it means he won't have to necessarily contact me again.
What I want from the house is that I am 'happy' to sell it but not yet. Although I am doing ok, I don't feel that 6 weeks is long enough for me, or us, to have healed from the marriage and once the house is sold that is pretty much it in terms of our contact together. 7 years of marriage, love and commitment gone in 6 weeks (although separation ahs been for 8 months). Plus it is my home.
What if he wants to talk about the relationship? What if he asks how I am? What should I say? What if he refers to everything in the past tense and to us being just over - there not being any hope?
I am going to look different from when he last saw me as I have had my hair cut and I'll make sure I look good, but he looks terrible at the mo (or he did) so would that put him off and make him feel like he can't live up to me even more?
Should I meet him tomorrow or put him off?
Any help and advice would be much appreciated Thanks guys
