Hey SD!

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My L actually requires this at the onset of taking the case, when I went in the first time, she gave me a 1/2" thick stack of docs. to read and fill out BEFORE she would take me on as a client. So I am making my way through these.


I like your L. She sounds like she is not desperate for work. So many L's bill away and charge you for the time it takes you to decide what to do.

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As far as sticking to my guns, this has never been a problem, just in getting them out of the holster!


That is the mindset part. Good for you. You have that part down.

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Any ideas on the best course of action?


You are going to have to plan on how you and/or W are going to tell the kids. They need to be in the loop and secure regardless of whether you stay or go. And I cannot help you there since I didn't have kids with The X. I imagine it is best if you both sit down and tell them together and make it clear that neither one of you is D'ing them... That the D is between you and W maybe... I think the other posters are better equipped to help you.

I would find a two bedroom apartment and be prepared to move. I think this one depends on W's reaction. Once again, I don't know the answer - your L will be able to tell you more from a legal advantage perspective about whether living in the same house buys you any advantage. And of course, you will need endurance to get through this. It may be W's behavior is such that you cannot live in the same house for the period of time it will take to get through the D.

This may have to be a be prepared but wait and see type of decision.

As a lawyer, I cannot emphasize how important it is keep things constructive and to use your L as a mouthpiece if you cannot speak to constructively to W directly. My biggest challenge with clients with an opposing side is muzzling my own client. You do NOT want to go to trial. The goal is a legally fair (as opposed to morally fair) settlement. Keep that in mind - as far as how much you are willing to give if it comes to a point where you are facing a trial. You sound like you have a good L - she will tell you similar things.

Good luck. Make sure you take care of yourself. And stay strong.

take care,
AG