Hey g - What's allentown like? Now I've got that stupid billy joel song stuck in my head. I thought I'd banished it out of my memory back in 1984. Thanks Kerry!
Yea, not a very good song.
It is a nice town. There is about 700K in the Lehigh Valley but it doesn't feel that big. Mix of older neighborhoods, revitalized downtown areas, and newer 'burbs. Easy to get around, traffic not too bad. Lot of nice restaurants, seems like a lot of things to do - concerts, theater, community events. Surrounding areas are pretty, including the Delaware Water Gap region. Easy access to NYC and Philly.
Me45 W35 M6 T8 D16 SD11 D0 Dec 07: Bomb July 08: Busted! Thread
Hey, Kerry, that song actually is about Bethlehem and the economic downturn that resulted after the steel industry in the area collapsed in the 70s. Allentown just rhymes with more words. It is actually quite the booming place right now.
I talked to W. Basically asked how she was doing since she sounded so awful yesterday. Then I said, I know it's not the best time to tell you since you are already not feeling so hot, but I want to tell you before you heard it as a rumor from somebody else -- I'm going to be taking the job in PA. I told my partners this morning.
There was silence for a few seconds, then she started crying. Basically continued to do so for the next 10 minutes. Asked a few questions like when? selling the house? what's it like? But she really didn't say much, just wept most of the time. I asked to talk to SD to give her a few minutes, got to ask about her weekend with her father (they had a cookout), got caught up just a little, and told her I missed her.
I kept thinking -- this is what you wanted. You wanted to leave. You wanted the divorce. You are getting what you want and now you want to be upset about it. You want sympathy because you are getting what you want. But I just got back on the phone for a few minutes again, told her if she wanted to talk to call, then said goodbye.
Congratulations, G! I don't think you're making a mistake at all! It sounds like there are a lot of good reasons for the change: fresh start, closer to your D, etc. And I don't think it is slamming & shutting the door on you and your W. If anything, perhaps it will wake her up out of whatever fog she is in or whatever. But you've certainly made every effort to connect with your W (as we all do)!!! And now I have that song in my head too!!! Karen
Actually I think it does slam that door. But I considered and accepted that in making the decision. Like I said, I don't think she would ever move. I'm not trying to wake her up any more. I feel sorry for her. I still love her. But the rope is dropped.
Me45 W35 M6 T8 D16 SD11 D0 Dec 07: Bomb July 08: Busted! Thread
Ok, I just added Italian Job to my queue, (had good reviews so think that'll be good--I'm actually more of a Charlize fan than Mark Wahlberg though! :)) and had already added No Reservations and Must Love Dogs yesterday. Hopefully, they'll send them out soon b/c I mailed 3 back yesterday! What's up G; how are you doing? Did you tell your W the big news yet??? Karen
And telling your wife is a good thing.. the sooner the better. You're still married, she's a wreck and it's better if she is in the loop.
Changing where you live and work frees you from walking through town being the 'divorced guy whose wife left him for another man." And it gets you away from the clutches of all the women who've secretly wanted you all these years when you were unavailable.
A new place will have the history you create.
And if for some reason, your wife is able to fully grasp what's going on... someplace completely different is always the best way to restart.. since it's new beginnings for both. And she has to leave the other guy to make it work. Lots of choices.
As difficult as it is.. it's a win/win situation.
Boy.. are you amazing.. for a Star Wars geek that is!
I don't think you're making a mistake at all! It sounds like there are a lot of good reasons for the change: fresh start, closer to your D, etc. And I don't think it is slamming & shutting the door on you and your W. If anything, perhaps it will wake her up out of whatever fog she is in or whatever. But you've certainly made every effort to connect with your W (as we all do)!!! And now I have that song in my head too!!! 
Karen