He left then Cheated ---Now What???

[No Longer BH]

I talked again with my T and boy does she know how to help me feel better. Once again she just confirmed over and over that this is about HIM, not me. That I did and have been doing everything in this relationship to make it work and now that I am no longer there to take care of things, his life is going to keep spiralling downward. I have already seen that happening. She also pointed out that I am not the only one he is avoiding emotionally, but my son as well. If he where emotionally connected he would be taking opportunities to talk with S about what is going on instead of just sugar coating it and moving on.

She said that I need to go through an emotional divorce at this time to let go of the toxic relationship that I am in. Not to say that things cant work out later on, but he needs this time to go through whatever crap he has on his plate and I need to be a healthy distance from it, otherwise I will still be the excuse for his anger and he will never grow. She said that there is a chance that he may never grow anyway but this is the best possible chance, by getting as far from him as possible. She said that by even having these small little talks with him while exchanging S I was inflating his ego by making him think he got to have 2 women. She said from now on when I exchange S, dont get out of the car, just let S move from one vehicle to another. Cut the disfunctional ties. What is your opinion on this? Im afraid if I do that then H will just walk away. But hey, he already did that didnt he.

Need DBing advice on this one.