I went back again to read that first post and this is what jumped out at me:
Quote:
Constructive Criticism I called it.
I can understand constructive criticism b/c I am the type to give it......but I don't care to be on the receiving end of it. It hurts, plain and simple. No matter how much we think our loved ones would be better if only they would follow our instructions.....it still hurts very deeply. I have learned that one reason it hurts so badly is b/c we are the ones they turn to for validation. They want us to support them.....to cheer them on and encourage them. I know that when somebody gives me a lump of sugar, I work like a horse to be better at what I'm doing. In other words......feed my ego and build up my self esteem. I only wished I had not waited on long to learn that lesson in life.
I think that onstructive criticism can be a real killer to a marriage relationship! Perhaps with you wondering when is she going to walk out that door.....you have not been doing all that constructive criticism and it is paying off! You know, sometimes that is all it takes to change things. I believe that you have changed probably more than you realize and she is seeing those changes and liking it.
So, try to read the DB book when time allows and keep up the good work.
Sandi
Hey Sandi This is a funny coincidence, in regards to constructive criticism. I have not been back to this thread in a while, but just noticed that someone had posted. Wife wants to get started on a project at home this weekend and I was told that I had to stay out of it.....I asked if I could help and the answer was NO.....I slipped and said "oh come on, let's both do it and make sure it gets done right".....good one, eh? "Gets done right"....she actually got a little laugh out of it, but I knew as it was coming out it was wrong....and really one of my first slip ups.
