For the Guy with Kids and a WW4

[hopeful4her]

This morning, every one getting ready to go. In the bathroom, I am shaving and roomie doing her hair. She initiates some talk. She met nephews friend's parents the day before. The kids that is living with us. They needed a personal loan. She mentions that sometimes kids say things and make people out to be worse than they really are.

I'm thinking, "No sh*t, Sherlock. Do you EVER hear the things you say out loud?!" I am ALWAYS saying this to myself, because she is always saying stupid things like this.

I say, "Everyone does that. People do that all the time." I do not look at roomie, but I know she is looking at me. She leans over to me and says, "They do do that, huh?" She leans closer toward me, trying to get me to look at her. I ignore her. Keep my eyes focused on my shaving. I say, "Thats what kids do." I know she gave me a look, I just ignored it.

I go and change my clothes and come back to do my hair. She initiates some more. She starts to tell me a story about yesterday morning, she nearly sh*t herself. I look at her and say, "Figuratively or for reals?" She says for real and starts to tell me the story. Ended up having to run into the office bathroom and barely made it. I am laughing at her. She is laughing. I tell her a story about the mens room at my office.

I love to hear her laugh. She looks great today, by the way.

Yes, we talk about weird sh*t. Literally.

I remember, after Christmas, she was still hobbling around the house. It was only 2 weeks since she was out of the rehab. We were sitting in the kitchen and she starts to tell me how she has been constipated. REALLY constipated. Had been for weeks. It was all the meds she had to take. At the rehab she had to take suppositories. Once home, I had to go buy some for her at Wallymart, but they only came in this HUGE container. More or less a lifetime supply! We cracked up when I showed it to her. She told me a story of having to do them herself and we laughed.

She says to me, "I guess we must be friends, because I'm comfortable telling you my sh*t stories."

I reminded her, "Uh, we're more than friends."

[rop]

H4H -
I am stopping by and catch up with your sitch. I laughed so much at the "MLC for Dummies" it is hysterical. I thought for a microsecond to send it to W, but then, what's the point? I don't think you can appreciate it if you are not on this side of the fence.
The mixing signal W is giving you can drive you nuts - they keep you in "her world", while you have do drag her in "your world". In these days I am reading books that only few months ago I would never thought I was even going to consider them as "books". Stuff written by David DeAngelo and Ross Jeffries.
It is all about seduction - Don Juan De Marco style.
I am enjoying this readings a lot - and - following the guidelines of these books in the years of marriage I did EVERYTHING wrong with W.... so time to change my attitude with women.
I think I'll get the pictures of Don Juan, Thomas Crown and James Bond and staple them close to mirror in the bathroom....

I am a bit worried about the health of your W, you are going to have to be detached and keep an eye on her. Not an easy juggle but has to be done....

[rop]

H4H - another thing - keeping the kids you accomplish several things - first you give a strong message to the kids, you are fighting for them and the family - second you give a strong message to your W - her imaginary world where she can nicely walk away with the kids doesn't exist - third, once she is out she is going to feel much more alone, much more in need of her family - the chances to have her come back I think are much more.... actually I am sure she is not going to stay by herself or whoever without her family.
So, fight to keep the kids, bluff, say you talked to a lawyer and that he told you there is no way she can take the kids.

[JeffSTL]

H4H thanks for the laugh "MLC for Dummies"

I wanted to stop by because its going to be a busy weekend, I just wanted to say Happy Fathers Day to you


H4H: I am starting to HATE her night gowns. I have bought them all for her. Short, stretchy, clingy, low cut, very open. ARRGGHGHH! I could not stand this either, living with my W in the house and getting no lovin, like telling a kid in a candy store they cannot have anything.

I know you love her, and would do anything for her. Problem is she knows this also.

H4H Gonna be like Jeff and ask her that last week if she will sleep in my arms has she set a move out date, I may have missed that

H4H: Gonna be hard when she is gone. As puppy said, I take detaching to the extreme. instead of X-Games its X-detaching
I think its better that she is out of the house so I don't have to see her all the time.

Gotta go - I'll be back

We all have a long haul ahead of us, good or bad it's the path we choose in life that's important.

M45
W41
M10 3/4 years
D9, D6, D6, S5
OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me
WAM (Walk Away Mom) 05/31/08
Date I'll forgive W for A = never

[hopeful4her]

You guys would not believe the unbelievably long post that I just lost. The Friday the 13th gremlins just crashed my computer at work. Ya'll got lucky.

This time.

Thank you, Jeff. Same to you!

Happy Fathers Day to all the great dads here.

Rop, if she moves out, we will share D's equally. Trying to figure if one week or two weeks at a time is the least disruptive to them.

Jeff, roomie has set the ball in motion with an application. I think she only had to show proof of income, and I saw this in her lunch bag this morning.

No, I didn't make her lunch this morning. That was yesterday

I see roomie trying to be nice to me so I am trying to be nice to her. After I got out of the shower last night, she told me she was going to offer to cut my hair.

When I picked up D's on the first day of daycare and I wasn't on the list, they called roomie and asked her to describe me. After they hung up, I asked the director, "Did she say I was devilishly handsome?" She said, "No, but she said you were a big guy with whiskers under you bottom lip and needed a haircut!"

Roomie is funny.

Sent an email to roomie earlier:

HEY YOU!

Just thought I'd stop by and give a shout out

Not much going on here, even though Joseph is off.
Did you get in touch with your mom? If not, let me know and I'll get out
of here right at 6.

As usual, I hope you had a good lunch and your day is great.

Talk at you later.

Let me know.

Me.


She just replied:

Hey you, Are you yelling at me? Lol

I think I am getting off very soon, at least I'm trying too. I am
picking them up


Like LostPhil says, I was checking her temperature.

Does anyone know who Puppy is when he's flirting with Karen?

[kat727]

He happens to be just this wonderfully kind man in need of a little validation and some innocent fun. I'm glad I'm not the only one that noticed that...but then again I have been pretty guilty of that myself lately.

kat

[Puppy Dog Tails]

You guys would not believe the unbelievably long post that I just lost. The Friday the 13th gremlins just crashed my computer at work. Ya'll got lucky.

This time.

Thank you, Jeff. Same to you!

Happy Fathers Day to all the great dads here.

Rop, if she moves out, we will share D's equally. Trying to figure if one week or two weeks at a time is the least disruptive to them.

Jeff, roomie has set the ball in motion with an application. I think she only had to show proof of income, and I saw this in her lunch bag this morning.

No, I didn't make her lunch this morning. That was yesterday

I see roomie trying to be nice to me so I am trying to be nice to her. After I got out of the shower last night, she told me she was going to offer to cut my hair.

When I picked up D's on the first day of daycare and I wasn't on the list, they called roomie and asked her to describe me. After they hung up, I asked the director, "Did she say I was devilishly handsome?" She said, "No, but she said you were a big guy with whiskers under you bottom lip and needed a haircut!"

Roomie is funny.

Sent an email to roomie earlier:

HEY YOU!

Just thought I'd stop by and give a shout out

Not much going on here, even though Joseph is off.
Did you get in touch with your mom? If not, let me know and I'll get out
of here right at 6.

As usual, I hope you had a good lunch and your day is great.

Talk at you later.

Let me know.

Me.


She just replied:

Hey you, Are you yelling at me? Lol

I think I am getting off very soon, at least I'm trying too. I am
picking them up


Like LostPhil says, I was checking her temperature.

Does anyone know who Puppy is when he's flirting with Karen?

Hunh???

[fightingirish]

hopfher...

Have a nice "Father's Day"..

[hopeful4her]

kat, I think if I knew how to flirt better, I might not be in the mess that I am in now. I think when roomie started to get involved on the internet, the flirting started and that is how everything started.

Something I want to MASTER now. For the future. With her or the next one.


Puppy's like, "What? Who me? I don't know what ya'll are talking about?" Your funny.

Thank you, tal. Hope you have a good weekend.

Last night, I got off of work and called roomie to see if she had gotten the girls from daycare. She had just picked them up. She was going to go to the video store to drop and get some more movies. She says the girls are hungry. I ask if they want to eat in town. We agree on Chinese and to meet at the video store. At store, roomie finds a movie for us to watch, too. We leave in her car to eat.

On the way we are chit chatting, and then she says, "Did you talk to your L about 50/50?" I look at her and tell her no. "Why, did you ask yours?" I say. She says yes. "And? What does your think?" She says, "She thinks its a good idea. If your willing to split costs like daycare." I tell her that it has to be stuff that we agree on. I tell her that if she wants to keep D's in daycare, we have to figure out what ISN'T going to get paid. She said that L said that we should keep girls in daycare. I tell her that it is easy for her to say so. I say we have to agree on stuff, because Texas doesn't recognize legal seperation.

Get to restraunt and sit down. We are having a good time. D11 sits next to me this time. It is a buffet, so we all scatter, but roomie and I pretty much like the same stuff, so we are together. Eating and still having a good time. Roomie doing the usual people watching. Me too. She makes comments. Me too. I tell roomie, "We are such voyeurs." She laughs. We are talking about our day.

Girls go get more stuff and I tell roomie a joke. She laughs. I pause and ask her, "So have you gotten the apartment stuff done?" She says, "Where did that come from. First you tell me a joke, then that. You saw the boxes in the car?" I say that I did. She has a few more now. "You asked me about the stuff in the car first" I say. She says that yes, she is approved. I ask how soon. She says it will be ready on the 21st, but that she has not given them a date. I think I mumbled something about it being a trial.

She asks what my parents think. I tell her that I barely speak to them anymore. She has a guilty look. She asks why. I tell her that they don't agree. She says, "Their not happy with what we are doing?" I tell her, "Why would they be happy? Who is supposed to be happy?" I tell her that they don't agree with me fighting for my marriage. She is quiet and looking down, then D's come back. She says she has been helping a lot of clients going through divorce. I say, "I know. Me too. It's terrible thing." She asks how my co-worker and his wife are doing. The one I helped get back with his wife. I tell her they are doing well and still go to church at the early service sometimes. He gets the same emails from Pastor and we talk about them.

Roomie does not get them. I used to forward them to her. But that got thrown in my face a while back, so I stopped.

We comment on how lousy the food is tonight and laugh with each other some more. We leave and roomie is joking around and still commenting on people we saw and I push her shoulder jokingly.

We go to pick up my truck. I tell roomie about the young lady I talked to last week. The one that was crying at my desk. Now my co-workers call me Dr Phil. Roomie comments on how people open up to her, too. People always open up to us. We both help people and they trust us. Both. Back at the video store, we see a homeless person in back of the store. Roomie starts to look through her lunch bag. I get mine and we put stuff together we didn't eat. D11 and I go to the lady and give her the lunch sack. I bless her and we leave. Roomie says we did our good deed for the day.

At home, we clip puppies nails. I hold, she clips. All seven. Like an assembly line. We take showers and get to bed. I wake up at 3am and find my our arms have been on top of each other so long we are sweating. In the morning, getting reayd, I am making plans to go to Six Flags with D's. I ask roomie if she has plans. She says no, and ask if she wants to go. She says yes. I get off at noon. She tells me to go pick her car after I get off work. My truck has no AC right now. I ask her if she wants me to take her something for lunch. She says she doesn't know what time her lunch is. I tell her I will call first.

Maybe I'm digging to see if she is having lunch with OM. Oh, well.

Will go home, pick up D's, go to visit my parents then pick roomie from work and head to the park.

Why are my posts so dang long?

[kat727]

Because you like to present as many details as possible. You hold on to everything, hoping that it will give you some insight into your wife's trouble mind. Nothing wrong with that, just how you are. Happy Father's Day early.

kat