One more thing, Eagle. You write that you can't see why she's so troubled. If you look harder, you can. I suspect she's so troubled because she has a great guy and a terrific family and she pushed those kids out of her body (barring the possibility they were adopted) and her natural instincts as female - let alone as a person conditioned within a monogamous society - tell her that she's about to rock the world of her offspring and that she's being a complete idiot.
So - her being so troubled is good for you and your family. But her stupid swirl of sickening behavior is her problem and her mess and she's making a damn good one.
Your best focus is in your mirror and you look great, BTW
Me: 41 H: 50 M: 15 years S14-D12-D10 S: 05/07 Back home: 08/08 EA: 4 yrs