For the Guy with Kids and a WW4

[hopeful4her]

Picked D's up from daycare. A little later that I originally wanted to.

Truth be told, I think I was waiting a little later so that it co-incided with roomie getting off of work. I took her swimsuit with me just in case.

I know. Slap, slap. Snap out of it.

I go into the directors office and say, "So, I am the daddy, right?" They laugh and tell me that she forgot, once more, to add me as the parent, but faxed something to them later in the day. There were a couple of dads there picking kids up. They give me the look like, "We know,dude. We know."

WW calls me as we are at the truck. She asks me if I can pick up the girls, because she is late. It is 15 minutes to closing, and she is calling me NOW? I tell her I just picked them up. I tell her that they told me what happened, but she said she tried to add me, but the manager wasn't there in the morning. She says she just finished with a client very late and has to wait for a phone call pertaining to them. I tell her that I am taking them swimming. She asks at the health club, and I tell her no at MIL's pool. She sounds a little surprised and asks if I already got their stuff. I say yes, and that I got some things for her if she wants to join us. She says she'll call me.

We are having fun at pool, but I am fully aware that she has not called. I keep checking phone. I ask D's what they want for dinner. Someplace we haven't gone to before. We dedide on Wendys. They have never been. WW hates it. She worked there in high school.

WW calls at 15 til 8:00. I am angry. I have actually been angry most of the day. Been doing some thinking. My detaching, I guess. She asks what we want for dinner. I tell her what WE are going to do. She says that she is in town, also. At Penny's. I say ok. She says, "Ok, wellll, I guess I'll see ya'll at home." I say ok. Bye. Bye.

My mind is racing as to what she is doing. Pennys? She told me she was at Pennys the day I found the first receipt for a hotel room. Even if she IS at the store, she doesn't want to hang with her kids? My last thought is maybe she went Fathers day shopping now that she had a quick chance.

She sounded disappointed. I'm surprised I didn't invite her.

We dry off and change clothes. I am debating. Debating.

I call her back. "I know you hate Wendys, but your invited to eat with us if you want to."

She quickly says ok and we agree on which one to meet at. The one she used to work at. We get there at the same time. D11 runs to her, but D6 stays with me singing a song.

I don't acknowlede WW. I am upbeat and we go in to order. When inside, she tell me hello. I tell her hello. We order with a someone who seems to be training. A kid. I have to keep ordering. I order so many things that I don't even remember what the heck I ordered. He is reading it back and I am looking at WW. She is grinning at me. I always get the good ones. I say, "Sounds good. I have not idea what I just ordered anyway." I pay and we sit down.

We are eating and WW is asking about their day. D6 is sitting next to me and looks really tired. I am teasing and playing with her, but she is not too playful. She lays in my lap. D11 dedides to shoot a spit ball at my face. It sticks to my face and WW laughs and says we are lucky she didn't have anything in her mouth. I get up and try to wipe my face on D11's face and we are both on top of WW. We are being kind of loud. I go back to my chair and I get another spit ball. I take straw from my frosty and corner her and shoot frosty at her. We are having fun and I announce it is time to go.

Me doing stuff like this is a 180 for me. Not worrying what others are thinking. D11 decides to go home with me and D6 goes with WW. I leave before WW. We all stop at gas station. I gas up and WW is getting water bottle filled. We fill our own 6 gallon water jug for drinking water. I put in the back of her vehicle and notice she has some boxes broken down. She is getting ready for a move.

I leave before she does again. At home, girls in bed. I wash dishes and WW is cleaning up after pups. I hear her yelling at them. She has changed into her night gown. I am starting to HATE her night gowns. I have bought them all for her. Short, stretchy, clingy, low cut, very open. ARRGGHGHH! She comes out and shows me the back of her legs. Ugly scratch. Bleeding. I am pulling up her gown and rubbing the scratch on the back of her knee.

I am hating myself for letting myself get excited. I then debate about taking a shower. Maybe I'll wait until morning to let her walk in on me again. Nah, I'll take one tonight. I get out and WW comes from outside. I sit on bed. She brings a huge Pennys bag in front of me and lays down on bed. "Try them on before the girls give them to you." I'm a little confused. I say, "Where are ya'll going to be?" "Nowhere. I wanted you to try them on first before Sunday in case I got the wrong size." I have lost quite a bit of weight. I try them on and 2 of them are too big. She compliments them and says she likes the colors. 3 shirst, 3 ties and socks. We talk a little and decide to return 1. Maybe a white one instead and smaller.

I put it all back in the bag. I feel bad for what I was thinking earlier and I tell her thank you. "Your welcome." I say the girls will be excited. She is falling asleep.

Lights out.

As usual, I do not sleep well. Up every couple of hours. I find our feet touching. This time, her foot is rubbing mine. I again enjoy then fall asleep. I wish I could hold her. Gonna be like Jeff and ask her that last week if she will sleep in my arms. No strings attached.

Down a bit today. Thinking about her and time she might spend with OM in her apartment. Gotta put up the stop sign and just think about my D's.

Hope for the best and take care of myself.

Gonna be hard when she is gone.