Quote: ll, you don't mean your h has been checking on it, do you?
yes it would imply that h was looking at it.
so things I heard from h this morning...
I'm sorry (for this past year)
I'm sorry (again for this past year)
yes I'm happy...
and I love you very much
we have a lot to look forward to
these statements came from a converstaion that I half started just by feeling frumpy...h asked if I felt frumpy and I let him know I did...that this past year has been long...that I'm scared etc.
I told h that I want to feel safe...
h let me know I am...to let my gaurd down when I'm comfortable doing so...
h knows I still have a bit of a wall up...h doesn't know how to break down that wall and seems to understand that it will be my choice not as a result of some grand gesture on his part...that with time I will open up.
I just wish I could find a way to break down that wall.
I let h know I always loved him...h responded with I've always loved you too.
time and patience I suppose...time and patience...I want to lift this cloud.
h should be home by noonish today and then he will work in the yard with the "loader" as son calls it (the bobcat) to level the "construction area" as son calls it to this afternoon put up the pool we bought (we bought an easy set pool to get us through till we are ready for a "real" pool)
