Isn't it strange the relief that comes from not have that "hurricane" in our lives? I can go day to day and not really think about it but then I see something I know he would like and I get blown off course a bit. Stay steady Sara you are a wonderful person and deserve the best.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
great job hon)))))))))))) I also bought out my stbx's part and now the house is under my name only, with the plunging prices I was able to give him a fraction of what he could've gotten last year. I also squirm a bit about what he'd do with the money... then I reminded myself that it is none of my business anymore, that all of our $ is God's and one day we will all be held accountable with what we did with it.
I also felt a new kind of peace after stbx left, I was sad of course buthis toxic cloud was off me, I didnt' live in a constant state of "is he with ow?" "is he telling me the truth" "what will he say next? that he's leaving me?" I was off his crazy rollercoaster.
Be not afraid...I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten Joel2
30something 2kids survivor of S, MLC, A, D I have peace in my heart, at last.
((((Sara)))) if you have some peace, then it is worth it.
Take care of yourself. Go have some fun!
Corey
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
I actually have made a friend (yes it is a male...) who is going through the same thing (found his wife in bed with another man). We have been hanging out, complaining about our lives and laughing at things. It is nice to have a friend who understand exactly what I am feeling. Both of us have agreed that we dont' need to be in a "relationship" at this stage and just need a good friend. So that is what it is. Watched a movie with him last night. And a few nights ago I went over to his house and we watched some funny things online and laughed. It is nice to get your mind off of all the things going on.
Today I moved more of H's stuff out of the house. I found a paper he had written in college. It was some sort of an autobiography. It said something like, "I love my wife and I don't want to live my life without her." I obviously started crying. My mom was helping me and she was so kind. She took all of the wedding photos off the wall and boxed them up and took them away (I assume to her house). She told me that all this makes her sad and she can't imagine how I feel. It is difficult. But I can't start making the house more "mine" until I get more of his crap out of here.
I meet with the lawyer again...one week from today.
Sara
Me-31 H-38 M: 5 yrs T: 7 yrs No kids Went to Prostitutes 10-1-06 Found out about OW 12-24-07 Bomb on EA/PA: 1-2-08 OW ended it with H "for good" 3-8-08 OW is back 4-19-08 H and OW tell me that they are in love 5-19-08 Filed for divorce 6-5-08 Divorced 7-2-08
Sara: I actually have made a friend (yes it is a male...) who is going through the same thing (found his wife in bed with another man). We have been hanging out, complaining about our lives and laughing at things. It is nice to have a friend who understand exactly what I am feeling.
Wow you move on fast, just kidding, good for you, we can always use more friends. Have fun be safe, enjoy yourself.
please read my post, I responded to your comment about forgiveness. Please don't be upset with me, its just the way I feel and I don't think I will ever feel differently.
Just checking in before I go to bed, good night Sara, sweet dreams
We all have a long haul ahead of us, good or bad it's the path we choose in life that's important.
M45 W41 M10 3/4 years D9, D6, D6, S5 OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me WAM (Walk Away Mom) 05/31/08 [b]Date I'll forgive W for A = never
(((Sara))) glad you found someone to hang with thats fun and makes you laugh, laughing is good. I know how you feel about boxing up H stuff, I was mad when I did it last weekend, but now looking at the empty walls and where his stuff used to be just makes me sad, my kids too.
Take care.
corey
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
just kidding, good for you, we can always use more friends. Have fun be safe, enjoy yourself. 