Quote: try to take it a day at a time and not project into the future.
like not even 20 min into the future right??!!
so after my pity party..h has not time...h makes no time...h doesn't accept invitations for time...h is grumpy...yada yada....h calls at 5:30....I reluctantly answer in my happy (but not fake) voice...h is in babble mode...on and on he goes...on and on he goes...laughing...telling me blow by blow his last hour or so...using a funny voice...sounding positive and upbeat...not the grumpy complainer who came home and swore and then went to sleep.
so feeling a bit safe...I mentioned a poster I noticed at the packy (for you non new englanders that's a liquor store) about a resteraunt that has live music in the evenings...free...byob...said I'd like to check it out...h said that sounds like fun..we can do that tommorow night..so now the hunt for a sitter...and simply the fact that he was willing to go and said he could be home by 5:30 tommorow night is enough for me...(for today anyway)
LL rants...LL raves...LL is a basket case...LL does have a lot of mixed emotions...LL is still trying to figure things out..LL is still trying to understand what to make of all this crapola...LL will go up and down..LL will at times refer to herself in the third person (well she is a basket case after all and that's what "those" people do isn't it) LL just needs to breath and calm down....calm down...breath LL...you're going to be ok...it's just going to take a while...this crap didn't happen over night....it's not about one incident...this is a compilation of many many years of each of you unknowingly hurting the other...now you each are begining to understand those unintentional hurts and learn from the lesson they forced you to learn...youre going to get there...just stop looking for the destination and enjoy the view along the way...
