hi again, just a last check in before trying to do that sleep thing. \:\)
Great ideas. I will ponder them as I have a lot of drive time this week.
The move back in by date feels weird to me as well, I want to move back in (or invite him to move in here) not because of a date on a calendar, but because of actions we have both taken to make a safe, respectful, caring environment for a relationship to continue to grow.
As far as his perspective, I know exactly what you mean.. it can be very different and eye opening if one takes the time to really listen and see it from the other perspective.
I know he would tell you he is very very scared of being left again. His biggest fear is losing me and never being part of my life again. I heard it repeatedly when we were dating & early in the marriage. He never felt worthy of 'winning me'. So I know that my leaving has ripped at his worse fear and his reaction to that is wanting the guarentee to hold me to my promise of 'committment' to the marriage.
Yes, the ball & chain was partially a joke... I do NOT want what it was to me before. So when I view it as it was, I see it as a ball & chain. I need to change my view point of how it could be for he & I to quit viewing it as only what it was. I am finding it difficult to do so, as until I can replace it with other images, feelings, & thoughts, until we are close enough to allow that to happen, how does it happen? I feel it is a catch-22 for me right now. That is my problem to work on.
Divorced 03/2010 Mom to two amazing kids
Taking the road less traveled because those encountered on the way may be just as unique.
