Don't feel like an idiot. It is easy for me to say all that now, trust me I fell off the wagon plenty of times.
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I'm trying to figure out if I should just at this point go totally dark when he leaves?
I think you should let him initiate contact. I think he will because he will definitely be missing his girls. If you contact him, you aren't letting him miss you.
I think those are good goals. No more R talks. They don't do any good right now and they are emotionally draining for both of you.
