I hope today brings you more peace! I am sorry I wasn't hear last night. Been kind of under the weather.
SF is so right, your H porbably won't even remember what he said. I know my H didn't remember alot of the jurtful things he said. I had a witness to it, my S. That's when my H said to both of us that he was totally screwed up!!!
I wanted to comment on when your H is telling everyone that he is getting a D. I heard that too. My H was telling my neighbors, his brothers, my family, everyone. He wanted to justify what he was doing. Whatever!!!! It did cut like a knife though. I was also scared to see sheriff cars around the neighborhood. I was afraid that I would be served any time. It didn't happen! So like I said that doesn't mean anything right now. Hang in there.
I hope you are feeling better!! I guess I'm more at peace today, I'm really tired tho.
I hope he doesn't remember all that he said to me. It was so terrible & hurtful!!! He just said he had to get away from me, that this marriage was over! Well, I guess he is right & it is over.
I do hope that one day he will realize what he has done & will come back. As someone said it's only a piece of paper & many people get back together after a D. I sure hope that is true with us.
Hey YR; Maybe I'll just stay away from the house that way I can't be served ...
I'm sorry you're feeling bad...I hope you feel better soon...I will pray for you...
H keeps telling everyone he wants me to keep the house..hopes we can be friends some day....and he wants to take care of me...of course he is telling everyone this because he doesn't want to look bad...he wants to look like he just feel out of love and he still wants me to be happy and taken care of...that will last until OW sees he has no money....
SF...you're right it does cost a lot that is why we are in limbo...if he could get me to a mediator he would but I insist on an attorney...but aren't I giving him everything he wants right now...he only sees the kids when he wants, of course it's just son cause the girls don't want to speak to him...gets to be with OW...go out...have fun...go out of town with OW...gets money when he wants it....he is living the life he wanted...I know...I have to quit dwelling on it but why would he want to come back if he has all he wants?? Is that a dumb question?
Treese
Last edited by Treese; 06/12/0808:18 PM.
Treese
H 49 M 45 D 23, D17, S12 M 25 T 31 01/07 OW H at my door w/proof Bomb ILYBINILWY 06/07 Sep 01/08 headed for the greener grass, Mar08.B#2H has child who is 9 11/08 pos.paternity
I guess I keep hoping that he won't hold a grudge b/c I got the house & alimony. He hated his first wife & she didn't get alimony or the house, just child support. He also told me she had an affair. But he didn't really love her. He told me he didn't know what love was until he met me. He was only married to her 5 years & had one son by her. But he spent his whole life hating her. He told me the night he cussed me out that if I didn't give him a reasonable D that he wouldn't have any respect for me. Well, I know he thinks I didn't give him a reasonable D b/c he wanted to split everything in half. He didn't get much cash out of the deal & what he got all went to attorney's.
I know, I'm worrying about it but I know how he was about his 1st wife & how bad he talked about her. But she was manipulative & I wasn't & we were together 18 years total, so I don't know. I'm sure this OW is more manipulative than his first wife, she proved that by sending me a thank you for my H!!
My H also told me he wanted us to be friends when this was over but that was before I found out about OW & before all the legal process!
We both had great attorney's (good ones cost lots) & then we went to mediation. That cost over 1000.00 per hour, between both attorney's & the mediator. We were there 9 hours!!! My H had to pay it all so it cost him over $9,000.00. That doesn't include our retainer fees for both of our attorney's, that was 6000.00 total & I know my H went over his retainer so he had to pay more. If we had gone to court it would have been a whole lot more.
Remember, it's only a piece of paper & I hope & pray my H will come back. But I am scared b/c of all the legal stuff & everything. I guess if I had not stood up for myself it may have been a better chance of him coming back. I guess that's why I worry & I'm scared he won't. But he wasn't going thru MLC when he divorced his first wife, so just maybe he will remember the good times & not the legal stuff!!!
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