Yesterday was really rough emotionally. I havent been that down since the Bomb in March. What is really weird is that I think that she knows that I know. She won't admit it and I won't confront her because the Atty advised not to (yet). She seems much nicer and happier now. She now has me watching the kids, paying the bills and has her OM to be with. I understand why she is so happy.
LRT and detaching is now very easy. I don't want to see her, talk to her or be is the same house/room with her. I don't care what she is doing or why. I really think that the secret of DBing is that is it all about getting yourself ready to be divorced and healthy. That just so happens to be the best way to get the WAS to reconsider (because they see you moving on and they want both options as long as possible). I am definitely there in all ways. I wonder what the moderators think of this analysis.
It would be very very very very hard to take her back. I don't think that I can. At this point, it is wasted energy to think about it. If it comes up then I will deal with it.
My goals are now all about me and my actions/results. She is not on the list anymore.
