Too late for DB, thread 7

[cw68]

I'm breaking all the rules and it feels good! Got a call from the dentist today to remind H of his appointment Friday. His EA was with our dental hygienist, who was fired from that office last summer and then sued them for wrongful termination. I no longer go to that office for a different reason and had asked H to move because it was just bad blood. He obviously hasn't. Anyway, I told the lady that H no longer lived here, gave her his number and told her that L.C. was partly to blame then hung up. Childish, but MAN it felt good!! I don't even care if somehow it comes around to her and she knows that he's free. Last I heard, she was back with her husband and nothing I do will ever bring him back to me anyway.

Then I just sent H a text as he was driving away with the kids. "I hate u 4 what u r doing. There is any good in it 4 anyone except yourself. It's [censored] for the rest of us." Again, it felt soo good. I spent the 30 minutes before H picked the kids up comforting my S5 who kept saying over and over that he just wanted us together. D7 asked if we were ever going to get back together and before I could even answer, S5 said, "Never. It's never going to be good again." D7 was very sad and withdrawn today, too. This is killing me that it's hurting them, but I'm stepping up as best I can.

Regarding going back to school, I've actually changed my mind. I hired a career coach instead who can help me target appropriate jobs. She's a friend who has done wonders for people I know. I'm very excited that she's behind me. If the job search turns up nothing good after a while, I'll think about school again. What I was going to study isn't a big desire of mine, I'll see if I can do something more enjoyable first. If that doesn't work, then I'll use it as plan B. Besides, I think I'd rather "make it" on my own without any help from him.