I think 'thanks for the offer, but it's OK, I'll look after it' would be enough of a response. Although I wonder if it took H some effort to offer to sort the appointment and scrip/the changes. Martians need to be needed. Is there any way you could let him feel like he's doing something good for you?
Just a thought. CEO recommended a place I could go to get good coffee so I'm going to pop over there tomorrow and try it!
Good for you Lisa! I have some pretty good breakfast tea. I'll have it in the morning just for you but I'll probably have to have coffee with me too just in case!
I'm going to have to ponder further how to respond. He is VERY into acts of service and he likes to be with S13. It's not that I don't want him to have access to him but I also don't want him to think I'm not capable. Argh, what a pain. I'm tired of thinking about it, yuck. Always on my toes to keep from spouting my "real" thoughts.
Going home right now and I'll check in with everyone when I get there. I've been so crazy busy at work today that I haven't been able to read posts. Gees....they expect me to work???
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
I responded finally to H. No response back from him yet so I don't expect one. I said:
I'm sure I can pick up the scrip on 16JUN after jury duty. I"m just not sure about 23JUN. I'm managing the office that week. I know you're going to be busy so no worries. I'll figure it out.
I guess I just had to get that "dig" in there about him being busy.
I'm probably not going to be able to do the Dr. on 23JUN so I'm going to call them tomorrow and see if I can get it rescheduled again. That bugs me. I may have to break down and ask him to take him but I honestly don't want to.
I'm pretty sure now with his lack of response that he's pulling his crap together to go file ASAP. He will view our talk as the final nail in the coffin that he's burying our M in.
I don't understand all of this and I never will. To walk away from your family without fighting for it is ridiculous. I'm positive now that he's not MLC. He's just a WAH who decided he like it better away from responsibility and commitment. I really don't need that kind of a person in my life. His lack of concern for anyone other than himself sickens me.
I wish I could say that I'm done with him, but I can't be. I can't let go. I can move forward with my own life, but I will love him eternally and that is going to be my burden to bear for the rest of my life. This just totally sucks!
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
Knowing that your heart will always have a place for the WA.... forever is a bitter pill to swallow isn't it? I know exactly how you feel.... because I feel the exact same way!
I'm starting today with a new attitude. Going for my walk right now and going to sing loudly while I do it! The others on the trail will think I've lost my mind! Maybe I have and just don't realize it? Hmmmmmmmmmm........
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
((((Mishka))))) It IS reeally difficult to understand.
Originally Posted By: mishka422
To walk away from your family without fighting for it is ridiculous. I'm positive now that he's not MLC. He's just a WAH who decided he like it better away from responsibility and commitment. I really don't need that kind of a person in my life. His lack of concern for anyone other than himself sickens me.
I have to say that I kind of think that the selfishness coming out, and not being able to fight or discuss anything makes me MORE convinced that this is MLC. MLC people walk away without a thought because they're in such turmoil. They can't think of anyone besides themselves. They don't fight because they can't- they've lost touch with their real lives and are living almost in an alternative reality. If you can, try and find some of favourite weirdo's posts to read- they're very enlightening....
I don't kow if that's helpful. It doesn't make it easieer to understand their behaviour, but I do think the inner turmoil and confusion mean that slightly different DB tactics are needed for the MLCer than the WAS. Your H is still confused- it was only last week he was sending your flirtatious messages.
I know this is probably not helpful, but just wanted to throw it out!
BTW, I had a cup of coffee this morning and am now feeling hyperactive. Totally off my trolley- I'll have to go decaff next time!
Half-caff at least Lisa! Coffee is a type of caffeine not found in most other caffeinated drinks. I think it's EXTRA special! Not really, scientifically speaking, but it just seems to have an extra kick. I'm taking tea with me to work this morning along with my coffee. My office will think I've lost my mind or pulled an all nighter, but too bad!
Thank you for your thoughts on the subject. They really are helpful. I think I'm just stuck on thinking that his selfishness is his true character coming out after years of repression but I'm also a "glass half empty" kind of person too. I struggle daily with PMA!
Off to the showers. Hot, sweaty, sticky and gross right now from my walk/run.
Talk later!
(((((((Lisa))))))))))(((((((Michelle))))))))))
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
To walk away from your family without fighting for it is ridiculous. I'm positive now that he's not MLC. He's just a WAH who decided he like it better away from responsibility and commitment.
I've had the same thoughts about my H. From his own mouth though, he feels like he was fighting for our family. It was just in a way that I didn't recognize. Just as he didn't understand what I was doing.
Quote:
I wish I could say that I'm done with him, but I can't be. I can't let go. I can move forward with my own life, but I will love him eternally and that is going to be my burden to bear for the rest of my life. This just totally sucks!
As my Mama used to say "don't wish your life away". If you're not done, then just be still. Work on some peace for yourself as you're deciding what you want to do next in your life for you and the kids. You don't have to be "done" to consider these things and work towards them. Hopefully it will help you to feel things are a little less sucky.
