Yes, Kerry, please upgrade that bedding STAT! I still laugh every time I read "Donnie and Marie". So cute. My dog sleeps with me and my cat will join us on occassion.
I moved to the middle as an act of defiance. Kind of like, "Oh yeah. You wanna sleep downstairs? Fine, I'll just scooch on over and enjoy alllll this wonderful space. I don't need your warm body in my bed. I'll be fine all by myself. So there."
I had a dream that my husband found out about DB. I was sitting with a few of my fellow DBers and my husband showed up and started mocking me asking if I thought I could actually bust my divorce. Then just as my alarm was about to ring he joined me in our bed (sexy time). That part wasn't a dream. It was nice. But I miss the emotional connection so much.
M: 37 H: 36 Married: Aug 13, 2004 Decision to Divorce: July 20, 2008 Reconciled: September 2008 Current: Ambivalence
I also use one of those long round Hello Kitty body pillows (that W left behind) and I lay my head on a Tiger pillow. Time for me to man it up a bit - I am going to have to get me some Cabelas bedding and giant fish pillows.
Then just as my alarm was about to ring he joined me in our bed (sexy time). That part wasn't a dream. It was nice. But I miss the emotional connection so much.
Hey girlie, you know I think you're awesome, but something is wrong with this picture.
He won't share a bed with you, but he'll crawl in bed to have sex ? I think I'd have to draw a line here, & tell him no way pal. He's getting his needs met, & you're left hanging. You want him to sleep with you, & you want the emotional connection. Is this you bending ?
Hugs. xoxo
M 19 years, MC for 8 months, DB'd for 8 months 4 kids; 18, 15, 14, & 10 I was never meant to be a doormat. It took me years of therapy to become assertive enough to stop his abuse.
I have to agree with smartcookie. Michelle mentions this and says it can be ok to have sex with an estranged spouse if you are comfortable. I think this might be the one thing of Michelle's that can be argued against.
However, you have to be careful if you are going to reject him when he wants sexy time. You cant make it seem like you are witholding sex as sort of a ransom for his emotional affection towards you. Instead, indicate that you feel better having sex if it is for love as opposed to physical gratification. And right now in your marriage you dont feel loved. Let him know that you need some time just as he needs time to forgive you.
Ms. GFI...how are you? Thank you so much for your support this weekend with my "Pee Wee's Big Adventure in Hell."
Lemme know how you are and everything. I have emailed you and haven't heard in a while.
As long as you are ok with "sexy time" then I say go for it, but Gypsy also has a wonderful take on it too. You have to be ok with it being about the physical need and not the emotional tie or anything. I agree with DR, sometimes it is the only tie you have, but you have to be able to handle it.
Be careful and I'm thinking about you.
Corey (((Hugs)))
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
