He left then Cheated ---Now What???

[No Longer BH]

So my son has been exhibiting signs of depression lately. He has been having crying fits and saying his feels empty inside and he is never going to trust anyone again. Last night was really bad so I tried to call H to talk w him. Could not get ahold of him so left him an email describing things S was saying. He called me at 11pm and we started to talk. It then spiraled into I am to blame for the way S is feeling because I have put S in the middle by saying that I want to work on M. And the blame just kept coming. He said I was ruining my S life by stealing him away from his dad and that if I knoew what was best for S I would move right back home. I was destroying any stability he had and that is why he is so depressed right now.

I comminted that I did not steal our S away, I left to get to a better emotional place. Because I am the primary parent it is important for me to be as healthy as possible for him. Being at the house where I would have to see H all the time and possibly OW while taking care of the packing and having strangers walking in and out was not something I could take. I pointed out that his stability was already gone, long before I moved to my family's house and that S was going to have to get use to a new house/new school anyway. This way he is at least more familiar with the kids and the area.

It then spiraled into how this is why he just cant trust me becasue of actions like this. I am very selfish and this is why he left. He did not leave for OW, she came after he decided he could not trust his heart to me. He then went on to say, up until I left, even though he was with OW, his heart was still not closed to me. He was open to the possibilty of reconsilliation. WTF!

I told him as long as there was OW, there was no M. And as long as he did not want MC, there was nothing for me to go back to, we were staying put. I could just hear the anger pouring out of him. Once again, though, I know I did what was right for me. I do not feel guilty for the choice I made. I slipped up though and said to him, when you choose the actions you choose the consequences. The consequence of your A is us leaving.

God, I hate how screwed up in their minds they are! Like I'm the sefish one. Please.