I know it has been two months since I have posted but alot has been going on. I am in the process of starting a business with a partner and working on GAL and avoiding any relationship talks with my W. I have been reading alot of posts here and am getting some good information from them. I just wish us LBS could figure out exactly what the WAW want and need.
My W says she doesn't feel connected to me and some times she wants to try and others she doesn't. She said that her feelings for me are dead and is not sure she will ever get them back. She has said that she has been unhappy for a long time and things between us have been so tense for so long but in the last year they have gotten better. I asked her to open up to me and tell me what she is feeling but her only respoce was that she has hidden her feelings for so long she not sure she has any for me. She also said she has not contacted the OM since I found out about it. I know I need to stop dwelling on this issue because I cannot control it or her and if she is talking to him there is nothing I can do about it.
I have been trying to always be positive around her and we did go out on Friday to dinner and clothes shopping. But its just so hard to know if she is trying or not of if she is just trying to keep peace in the house for now.
I have kept up with M from Tennesse and CBK and it seems your just as confussed with your wives behavior as I am with mine. We still sleep in the same bed but almost never snuggle. I am usually asleep when she comes to bed since I am a morning person and she is a night person. I also have been moving to the couch early in the morning to avoid trying to snuggle with her and then she can wake up alone hoping she will see what she will be missing if I wasn't there. She keeps asking me why I do this and my responce is so my tossing in the morning dosn't wake her.
We have good days and bad. I have been going Golfing, out shopping by myself, working on my new business and trying to spend more time with the kids. I just wish I could detatch more and not worry so much about her. I guess I am like CBK i love her very much and just can't get it through my head that wothout being fully detatch I will never get her back.
Any advice would really be helpful. She has not said anything about D or seperation but a platonic relationship is not what I want.
OK. Here we go.
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I know it has been two months since I have posted but alot has been going on.
Any R talks at all, fights, etc. has your W commented on your new business venture. Did you keep her inthe loop about it?
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I just wish us LBS could figure out exactly what the WAW want and need.
Throw this out the window. LBS can't figure this out. This is about us making ourselves better. She might see something she likes and join you.
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My W says she doesn't feel connected to me and some times she wants to try and others she doesn't. She said that her feelings for me are dead and is not sure she will ever get them back. She has said that she has been unhappy for a long time and things between us have been so tense for so long but in the last year they have gotten better. I asked her to open up to me and tell me what she is feeling but her only respoce was that she has hidden her feelings for so long she not sure she has any for me
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Does she know that you know how you got where you are? Have you ever told her and taken responsibility for your part?
Forget about the OM for now and don't bring him back up. You outed her, she knows you know. You don't have to keep reminding her about what she did wrong.
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have been trying to always be positive around her and we did go out on Friday to dinner and clothes shopping. But its just so hard to know if she is trying or not of if she is just trying to keep peace in the house for now.
Are you still going out on Friday? Don't worry about what she is doing/trying. Worry about what you are doing. Don't give up.
Are you still in the same bed? If so stay there. I would change my schedule where I went to bed at the same time she did if at all possible.
Stop worrying about her and worry about you. I see positives in the sitch but if you chase her then she will run. So stop it.
Are you activly listening to her..Are you tunring off the TV when she talks, looking her in the eyes and soaking up every word she says? If not then I suggest you start. She has a problem with your listening skills and retaining what you hear.
be caring and considerate but don't be be pushy.. there to help when she needs it but don't smother her.
