Your date what ENORMOUSLY GIGANTIC in the scheme of things. its been a long long time since you saw him. Its SO normal now for your emotions to be totally out of control. I've been through it too!
It makes you go back to square one and re-analyse everything again with each new found bit of information. You will no doubt be exhausted as your brain tries to figure out, for example what the beard thing means, in the context of your whole relationship and you as a person! And that's just the beard! I dont think you can stop it either - your brain just does this weird thing, you go through all the highs and lows again, and you are absolutely drained at the end of it! Dont fight it - it will happen. But know that you will come out of this stage a stronger more centered person. And you will go back to normal, and probably be more accepting of the situation then you were just a few days ago.
Just so you know.... the beard thing is NOT attractive! I cant think of any girl I know that finds that much facial hair a turn on!
Accepting that your lovely BF does not appear to exist at the moment is really hard. It doesnt mean that he wont exist again in the future. But its true he's not existing here this moment. You dont have to like it, but it will help your emotions if you chose to accept it.... (((T)))
Be so gentle on yourself T - dont expect anything of yourself at the moment. What you have done is huge - you put yourself out there again, and dared to hope. Go back to the basics of concentrating on yourself and what brings you happiness and peace.
You were absolutely amazing on your date! He is SO impressed and intrigued I'm sure. I bet you knocked his socks off (you get a million gold stars for bringing up socks in the context of poker! what a pity that BF had no idea how witty you were being!)
