Onward and upward

[mishka422]

I know in my head that you're absolutely right Jeff, but my heart can't seem to get past the pain.

I had such strange dreams about him last night. I guess it's all of my fears coming out. I didn't get any sleep so I didn't get to go for my walk this morning. I'm going to have to go tonight when I get back from S13's karate class. That is after 9pm. I really hate going that late at night. It scares me.

Just trying to let go, move on, and know that God works all things together for good if we let him.

Michelle

[Virtually_Handsome]

(((((((Mishka))))))))

Let go, and move FORWARD! Move on sounds like you are moving away from something, move towards something instead. Move towards a better you!

[One Day]

(((((mishka)))))

Sounds like quite a conversation yesterday. It's good that H still considers coming home.

I think your H, like mine (hopefully) is going to be in his cave for a while now. So in the meantime, you need to get out and enjoy yourself. Let him withdraw and deal with this. I don't think you've blown it AT ALL!

L. xx

PS> Seriously? No tea?!!

[mishka422]

Thanks Lisa. It's encouraging to hear that you're not convinced I made a total mess of things. I hope not. I think I'm just scared. H is all I know and have ever known. I've been with him since I was 18...that's half my life! I have no idea how to create a new life but I'm figuring it out quickly.

Seriously, tea is just not my thing. I like it when I'm sick or when the coffee is awful. Otherwise, not really. It's not that I don't like it, I do, I just prefer coffee. Like I said, the other blood in my system beats my English blood to death for coffee!

[MichelleLT]

(((mishka))) You will be fine. No worries!

[mishka422]

Oh yeah, definitely English Lisa. How's this for ya? My maiden name was Hampton!

[mishka422]

Ok all - here's the deep thought for the night. Ponder this one......

Do you ever think about the fact that you gave your heart and soul to your mate only for them to throw it away? How do you get it back from them and try to make yourself whole again. The piece you gave them is broken, damaged. It wouldn't fit back in place again if they did give it back. What do you do to fill the void?

Ok, deep thought over......yuck! I hate those! Especially when I'm trying to fall asleep. I just want to get them out so they don't continue to rattle around my head.

[mishka422]

FYI - If anyone is looking for an interesting book to read that is not a self-help book (yeah, because I haven't read anything but those for the last 6 months!) I have been reading a book called "The Shack" by William P. Young. I won't even describe it to you. Look it up. Intriguing stuff, really.

[Grace_O]

Perhaps it is no accident we fell in love with our spouses. Perhaps all this is so that we learn to open our hearts to possibilities. Perchance with them or perhaps to realize that our hearts that were given to them freely and in good faith are much larger and stronger than we ever imagined. That the void is a way of making more room. After all, love is one of those things that grows when it is shared.

I'll check out the book. Thanks for putting it out there.

[mishka422]

WOW GRACE!!!!! That was amazing insight! Thank you.

On that thought, I'm going to bed.

G'night all! ((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))