You're right - I should have gone dark awhile ago. But I don't think it'll look like pouting about her party. I told her I needed to stop seeing her after she came by my office and wanted to catch up on what each of us is doing. After that is when I sent an email calling off our lunch date and telling her now is not a good time to try and be friends - maybe after the D is final, but she wanted to pursue R with OM.
Didn't hear anything. She leaves for 3 weeks in the field next weekend. I'm not forcing, I'm trying to protect myself.
I guess I realize that she's intent on NOT making this work. I realized in going over events 9 years ago that at that time she was also intent on not making things work but then she relaxed and allowed herself to spend the day with me. We had a lot of fun and connected as usual and that's what made the difference. This time that is the one thing she's been absolutely adamant about - no activities together.
So I'm going dark to try and not think about her and what she's doing, but focus on myself and what I'm doing. The long friendly conversations she kept initiating was allowing her to get the best parts of me without investing back. IMO.
