Onward and upward

[mishka422]

Absolutely right MMF! I don't want to go backward so I'm being extra cautious.

I'm not sure why I let things get to me the way I do. Today was a rough day and it's not directly H's fault, it just bothers me so much.

My cousin dropped me an email and said she saw my H with "Broom Hilda" (the OW) at chick-fil-a this morning when she dropped in to grab breakfast. H got up to go to the bathroom and OW stayed there talking to the other officer they were eating with. My cousin joked that she was probably hitting on him while H was away since she's such a skank.

It was like someone plunged a knife into my heart and twisted hard. The thought that he was there having breakfast with HER made me so sad. I cried all through my lunch hour and feel so depressed now. FYI - he's not supposed to be out with her in public in his uniform as he is not divorced from me and he's representing the city per his chief. I was so tempted to send an email to the chief annonymously telling him what H was doing this morning but I stopped myself. There just isn't any point. It's not like he's going to break things off with her because of it and he could lose his job. I can't afford for that to happen so I just sat on my hands and sucked it up.

I can't fight off the sadness right now. It doesn't help that my plans for Saturday night just fell through also. I could still go but I'd have to go alone. Considering it's a 1.5 hour drive each way and not a good idea to walk into a huge club alone I guess I'm not going. I need to find something else to do since H is going to have S13.

Any brilliant ideas anyone?