I had another good day with my kids yesterday. I always sooo look forward to the time I have with them. It is always nice to be with them.
We didn't do anything really fantastic. Just sort of regular life, you know? I had found a stormwater storage pond with giant tadpoles in it, so we hiked there and caught a few. We hung out around the house, made lunch, watched a movie, snuggled, tickled, giggled, worked on a few crafts, talked a little, had dinner. With four kids it's hard to parcel out the attention with the right balance. But so far it's pretty good.
It is bittersweet to hear them say "awwwww" when I tell them it is time to go. I feel the same way, I don't want our time to end. But, the other part of me is pleased that they enjoy their time with me.
My youngest is really warming up to me. For a long while she was distant, angry, hurt I guess - about me not being at home with her. Since January probably. She never said as much, she's only 6. But I could tell from the way she acted. But lately she is much more snuggly, cuddly, and giggly. I'm feeling much better about her.
So... nothing really dramatic. That's my life as a father these days.
I'll call you later, dude.
M 43 S14 S13 D11 D7 Divorce final: Jan 2009 Making it up as I go....
Oh, I have to say... From time to time I get down about my situation. I write "Life happens now" and I want to follow that path but it is not always easy. but yesterday I lived up to that ideal.
Any time I am with my kids I feel great. So happy to be with them. As we sat down to dinner yesterday, I told them that. I told them some people say grace before a meal, a little prayer of thanks. I told them that I am thankful for being with them, for being together.
But when I am not with my kids, I can get down. It's quiet in my house.
After I dropped them off I carried the positive vibe into a bike ride. I've been slacking off on the exercise, which means I've gained weight and also, no phyiscal activity is bad for the 'tude. Which makes me not wanna ride. It's a vicious cycle. So I consciously surfed the positive mojo from the kids' visit into a bike ride. I rode for two hours yday evening. Strenuous. A really hilly route I used to ride 3 or 4 times weekly. It was much harder now - I've been not riding for about 8 months. My legs and lungs are not what they once were, and the extra weight doesn't help on those hills. But still, enjoyable. I stopped and watched a baseball game at a field near the trail I rode. I thought of all my son's games I watched last year. (This year he didn't do baseball.) Then I turned around and rode back to the house.
I gotta say, the exercise feels soooo good. I resolve to get back in the habit.
M 43 S14 S13 D11 D7 Divorce final: Jan 2009 Making it up as I go....
I love the "Life Happens Now" slogan. I'm starting back w/ cardio exercise myself as I've been too lax w/ it. I've been lifting upper body, but have neglected the cardio and legs.
We have our court date set for Oct. 6 as we met w/ the judge this morning. I'm pretty confident we can work it out before a trial, but it is still very sad to begin the concession process that my M is over.
Now, I'm just waiting on the ruling from the parenting evaluator as far as custody goes and then we can really begin the process of moving forward w/ my life.
I know you'll be there shortly as well. I'm hoping for a similar good outcome for you, my friend. Hang in there and you'll soon have more good times w/ your kids than you are allowed to have now.
They'll still want to be w/you b/c they know who you are and that will shine through. Keep going strong and you'll be ok.
I'll talk w/ you later. Hey, did you get my phone number? Let me know b/c I'll resend it to you if you didn't.
