If you file LS expect him to feel justified and less guilt about what he's doing. I wouldn't file unless I was 100% certain I wanted a D. If you are worried about finances, drain 1/2 of all shared accounts and put that money in a separate individual account. If you feel uncomfortable doing this, at least open up a separate account and start putting your savings into that. This doesn't mean you still won't have to split up finances 50/50.
You might also ask a trusted family member to hold money for you in their own name so if things go downhill at least you have a little nest egg of money he can't touch to help you with the transition. Don't take big chunks of money out. Just a little here and there...
Yes, a lot of relationships do spiral into D with many not reconciling. But some do reconile. My husband filed, was completely CERTAIN he wanted D, after 21 years of marriage and two kids. I DBed, learned to let go, created my own life and slowly, very slowly, just before the first court date, he said he wanted to stop the D. So it can work, but I did not expect it to. I just figured it was my best chance and I might as well go "down with the ship" knowing I did my best (and eventually, once I worked through some of the pain and started GALing, having a great time while it was sinking!!!)
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
