Jak and Matilda, I felt a hug and your compassion in your last posts. I am touched by your kindness and commitment to my thread. I do feel safe posting to you and the Piecing forum. The veterans on this forum get what it's like to be a LBS trying to piece a M together.
There are no simple answers or guarantees. The occassional post I receive, like the recent one from a junior member isn't helpful. I certainly disagree with that person's observation that nothing has changed. I don't think turning into an "alpha male" is the answer either (and it wouldn't be me). If anything, I'm trying to hold onto and cultivate my inherent strengths, and keep healthy boundaries with my W, rather than turn into someone who loses themselves trying to make her happy.
I think one can be quiet and strong. I don't feel weak or passive. I feel like I'm getting stronger, and happier.
Not being able to control one's spouse doesn't make one weak. Everything she does is not a reflection on me. I certainly am frustrated. I try to know when it's time to stand my ground, and when there are things beyond my control.
My W was wondering if I would be able to manage such a long flight. She found out that it's a nine hour flight from Dallas to Hawaii. She wants a pleasant travel companion.
What does this mean? It's too early to say. I don't want to overanalyze it. I will keep you posted.
Thanks so much for being there. This ordeal would be so difficult to go thru alone.
We had another private dance lesson last night. She wants us to to learn West Coast Swing, so that we can venture to other dance venues, and broaden our repertoire.
The hardwood floors look great.
CL
CL 53 W 54 M 20 yrs. 03'-09' Separation + Old Patterns + GAL 10-14' Piecing
"The Master allows things to happen. She shapes events as they come."
