I've read that from Harley also. And with the books she's reading and her attitude she seems to think that the affair is ok because it's been wonderful for her.....but what about me?
Could I get past it without the remorseful apology? I'm not sure. Could I get past it without an in depth discussion about how, why and what so we can make sure it never happens again? I don't think so. And really, I'm not sure I ever see WW being willing to discuss the how, why and what. And if she's not willing to discuss that stuff it'll show me she's not willing to face her part in this mess and YES, I believe that would be a deal breaker for me. I can accept my contribution to the condition of the marriage that allowed this to happen, but if she can't face her own demons and why it happened, I'll never feel safe that she won't do it again if we hit a rough patch in the marriage, and I can't live like that.
So maybe in a 6 months, 9 months, she'll be all over me because of the changes I'm making and she'll commit to the marriage and I'll be the one walking.....
Maybe. Or maybe she'll come around more slowly, on HER timetable, and not yours. I don't think she's ready yet. So long as her ACTIONS aren't wayward, and she is reasonably loving toward you, I think you have to ride it out, don't you?
Look at it another way -- the OPPOSITE way: what if her words and emotions were all full of tearful remorse, and her reading was full of deep introspection . . . but her ACTIONS were wayward? Unacceptable, right?
