Well I told my H way back at the beginning that was going to fight until the end. I think I will still be fighting even after the divorce. I want to be with this man...well the one that married. The guy that made me laugh all of the time and who understood me better than anyone. God I really, really MISS that guy. I wish he would have at least kissed me goodbye before he morphed into who he is now.
Oh and the shirt comment was hilarious!
Me-31 H-38 M: 5 yrs T: 7 yrs No kids Went to Prostitutes 10-1-06 Found out about OW 12-24-07 Bomb on EA/PA: 1-2-08 OW ended it with H "for good" 3-8-08 OW is back 4-19-08 H and OW tell me that they are in love 5-19-08 Filed for divorce 6-5-08 Divorced 7-2-08
Living with a WAS nightmare kinda makes us all a little twisted. I love the humor that you all show. I brings a spark of light to an otherwise bleak situation. Thank you all for that.
Broken Hearted ------------------ Me - 36 H - 37 S - 8 Married - 1992 ILYNILWY - August 2007 Moved Out - March 2008 OW Revieled - May 28, 2008 Filed for D - July 2, 2008
Tomorrow is the big day and I am getting scared again. Tomorrow I go into the lawyers office and pay the $1,500 to have her start the paperwork for the settlement. I was fine about all of this all day up until now I am thinking "What on earth am I doing?"
Me-31 H-38 M: 5 yrs T: 7 yrs No kids Went to Prostitutes 10-1-06 Found out about OW 12-24-07 Bomb on EA/PA: 1-2-08 OW ended it with H "for good" 3-8-08 OW is back 4-19-08 H and OW tell me that they are in love 5-19-08 Filed for divorce 6-5-08 Divorced 7-2-08
I know. I know. What does your heart say? If you really delayed this for even a week, what do you think H would do? Would he change? Would you want him back? I am still thinking H was going to try to talk you out of this meeting tomorrow. But would you believe his promises again? My H never 'came back' to leave again, he was always gone from Day 1, so I don't know how it feels to be led on over and over.
I know, I know nothing is going to change. He is still going to be with OW and I am still shuffling between houses. I do think that H tried to call to talk me out of the meeting, but then again maybe not. I did discover something interesting today. When I went into the garage (where most of H's junk is now kept), I saw his suitcase and overnight bag in there. Those were always kept at OW's house. I wonder why he now has them in our garage?
I know the termoil I am feeling is because this is still not what I want. I know that I can forgive and trust my H again after all of this if I was given the chance. I don't want to divorce him. But I also know that nothing has changed in what feels like a very long time and nothing is going to change unless I do this.
Me-31 H-38 M: 5 yrs T: 7 yrs No kids Went to Prostitutes 10-1-06 Found out about OW 12-24-07 Bomb on EA/PA: 1-2-08 OW ended it with H "for good" 3-8-08 OW is back 4-19-08 H and OW tell me that they are in love 5-19-08 Filed for divorce 6-5-08 Divorced 7-2-08
Breathe deep, breathe deep. We all know you dont want this. The fact is that your H is being a complete sh!t to you right now and it is not healthy for you. You have tried so many things to get his respect and kindness and he still refuses to treat you with compasion. Unless he comes over tonight and begs you for another chance, agrees to MC and NC with OW this just might be the step you have to take to get to a better place. If he does not do those things, then you know he is not respecting you and is caking eating. Time to make him wake up to the reality of his choices. IMO.I know it is said over and over again here, but just becasue someone files does not mean the R is over.
Broken Hearted ------------------ Me - 36 H - 37 S - 8 Married - 1992 ILYNILWY - August 2007 Moved Out - March 2008 OW Revieled - May 28, 2008 Filed for D - July 2, 2008
Thanks brokenhearted, I know everything you said is totally true. But it doesn't make it any more scary. To be honest, I feel like since my Dad is giving me the $1500 for this, that I can't back away from it. But I guess I will cross that bridge if I come to it, right? I tried to call H just now. No answer. Probally a dumb thing for me to do. Surely he is back over at OW's house by now. Time for me to get all of the courage and strength I have and just do this.
Sara
Me-31 H-38 M: 5 yrs T: 7 yrs No kids Went to Prostitutes 10-1-06 Found out about OW 12-24-07 Bomb on EA/PA: 1-2-08 OW ended it with H "for good" 3-8-08 OW is back 4-19-08 H and OW tell me that they are in love 5-19-08 Filed for divorce 6-5-08 Divorced 7-2-08
Thanks brokenhearted, I know everything you said is totally true. But it doesn't make it any more scary. To be honest, I feel like since my Dad is giving me the $1500 for this, that I can't back away from it. But I guess I will cross that bridge if I come to it, right? I tried to call H just now. No answer. Probally a dumb thing for me to do. Surely he is back over at OW's house by now. Time for me to get all of the courage and strength I have and just do this.
Sara
Sara, don't call him. I'm sure he'll be in touch. You take care of you and just do what you need to do. Your H will have to sleep in the bed he's made or make a decision.
((((Sara))))
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
