Worse before Better?

[Sophie]

Well...I've been thinking...maybe it's resentment, maybe it's self protection....

He may be in crisis, but it seems that his blinders have slipped off a little, and he can see the true negative and positive forces in his life.

He tm'd saying that he gave his two week notice, that it went well with his supervisor, but that the stories might get pretty good when the men in the shop find out.

I replied, 'congratulations...that took a lot of guts and determination. P.s....I'll stay tuned'.

Now....I don't want him thinking I am okay with everything in his parallel world!!

The hairs on my neck stood up when he said he was giving his two week notice...he said 'It's over! I've put up with all I am going to! I'm done!"

OMG I've heard those words...a FEW times!! Same ones he used on me and our marriage! I held back, but I wanted to say 'OUCH...I've heard those words!!"

Anyway, I feel I have to let it be known (to him) that just becasue he quit a crummy job, that doesn't change anything about his behaviour toward me and the kids!

Maybe this is just a 'feel good' decision, like the feel good purchases of a camaro, motorcycle, riding lawn mower, new little car...like the first feel good decision of the OW..,,

This doesn't change the fact that after 3 years, 2 of them seperated, things have to change! I cannot get sucked back into him cake eating/coming an going whenever, and however. I still refuse to be involved in that parallel/non committal life he wants us to live.

So...do I write a note, reminding him that he told me to talk to 'someone'..I assume he meant someone in the legal field? Just because he was civil at a public soccer party for a couple hours, doesn't mean diddly squat to me... and the kids think it's pretty crappy that he has so much fun with other kids and then drives the opposite direction and won't do anything to be with them!

Oaky...see? The resentment rears up!! I like my distance and non interaction with someone who show such ignorance toward me and no regard for anything I am about, not to mention my feelings.

I am mad at myself for texting a nice message indicating I'd be waiting for more stories! Why couldn't I have just said, 'congratualtions' and left it at that??

I don't mean to portray resentment as much as I have made a decision and want to stand by it. I don't want any involvement with him anymore under the noncommittal terms that have been for 3 years.

I'm done!!

Okay....guidance?...How can I be friendly and pleasant without letting him float his way around here again?