WHAT THE _________ ?!!

[Virtually_Handsome]

(((((AmyC)))))

He's on man time, Amy! Really, I know all about this! It's a lot slower than Amy time!

I almost started to throw out a bunch of cliches, but I decided that might be a bad plan! Just a little more patience!

[Jack_Three_Beans]

You're [censored] Amy C, don't sit there and tell me that you can't do something.

Why can't you? Pride? Pain?

Get a straw.

Walk the walk you talk.

[AmyC]

Ok, how about I don't WANT to?

WHY? I don't need to type that out...we all know why this is a b*tch.

And I have walked it, Jack - the majority of it not too shabbily either - for 2 1/2 years.

Don't rile me further.

I haven't quit yet.

But I am going to draw a line soon.

[Virtually_Handsome]

But I am going to draw a line soon.

As long as it's a line he can see, I don't think that's a problem, at this point. But it can't be a secret line!

OJ

[Jack_Three_Beans]

Be clear about that line.
That is all I am saying.

Tell Jeff, be clear, here is the date.
My tanks are empty that's all I got darling, all I got left in me.
No miscommunication.

Don't end a marriage because of something left unsaid.
That would be tragic.

[Jack_Three_Beans]

Two guys telling you what guys think.

[fig]

Amy

not that I know a lot but I do know this...
don't set him up to fail

i know you handed him everything
and
he should be able to get it and tell youwhat he has decided

however
he is not us

Lis and I talked about how it should be woman up because we just do it
we don't need to hike on our britches

(no offense to the men on here...they are different I think)

anyway

draw the line
but show him the line

you don't need to go into everything again
you don't need to retell him

you need to show him the line
tell him its a line

we all have lines

but not everyone knows where they are

[Jack_Three_Beans]

Well said Fig.

[AmyC]

I had not talked about my marriage to anyone in a while.
It has been a long time since I posted daily and in detail about every little thing that transpired. I stood down a long time ago.

And when I went and talked with my husband 10 days ago, I talked to him on my own - using my own words, my guts and the strength of my faith.

I posted about talking to him because I wanted to share.

Mostly because I was proud of myself for doing it.

I still am.

I'm not putting a time limit on this.

I did that the day I had the talk with him.

By now I guess I just need to do what I said I was going to do.

D12 texted me repeatedly one day last week about summer school transportation. She was really stressing about it and I had already determined how we'd pull it off when her dad goes back to work. I called H to let him know it was actually going to be rather easy for me to handle on the days he works. He acted glad that I called him and blah, blah, blah.....but she told me on the beach Saturday that after he hung up he started yelling at her for calling me and telling her that she "doesn't believe in" him.

That chaps my ass.

He lays his crap at her feet too much and I don't even know sometimes why I could still love a man that would do that. He never did it before - but then that's because he never attempted to PARENT before....

All that considered - he may never change. And maybe I'm just back to where I've been before - realizing I'm the only one that's changed... I just don't know. But when D12 tells me things like that - I don't even know who he is.

So why bother doing anything anymore except trying to stay connected with her?

[Virtually_Handsome]

[color:#000099]
By now I guess I just need to do what I said I was going to do.

I think that's right.

I'm sorry about the crap with your D. I'm sure a lot of it is his insecurity, and the stress he has put on himself. But that doesn't excuse being a jerk! But, I'm not sure it is him, either.

Do what you need to do Amy, just do it calmly, and for the right reasons.

(((((AmyC)))))

OJ